The last two posts here have been about what I call the triad of elements that are necessary to disrupt and unplug the fears and anxieties that we acquire, and which we shield ourselves from with the Comfort Zone. What follows in this post are some specific examples of the use of those triad elements, along with suggestions on how to start such work with yourself.
As I said at the end of the last blog post I am VERY, very clear that this is often anything but easy to even think about, let alone do. Having a clear and articulate map of the nature of fear and anxiety is one thing, facing into those fears is something else – something often frightening, even terrifying. I believe this is why so many of us (including myself) find the idea of a medication or technique that can take away the fear, or quickly and painlessly “fix” our fears, very attractive. Many of us have lived with various levels of fear and anxiety for so long that we can’t imagine deliberately stirring it up, even with the goal of shutting down the causes of that fear and finding our freedom as a result. It is much more attractive to let sleeping dogs lie, leave those fears where they are, out beyond our Comfort Zone walls, and keep things status quo – however much we limit our lives as a result.
And, of course, our fears activate that part of the Chronic Anxiety Cycle I call the Indefinite Negative Future when we consider challenging the Comfort Zone. What if I feel this way forever? What if this doesn’t work? What if I do this work and all that happens is I can’t stop being even more afraid than I am now? Etc. I know that for some people reading the last couple of sentences has made them a little anxious. Ugh!
Let me repeat myself from an earlier blog post: the way out is through. And moving through the Comfort Zone walls we’ve created does not need to entail years of work or endless hours of fear and anxiety. Like any set of skills it will take a little practice and a little time. You probably won’t do it perfectly the first 2-3-4-5 times you do it. Who cares? Nobody masters bike-riding in a single session, nobody learns to type in an hour, and nobody will be perfectly adept at facing and moving through Comfort Zone fears out of the gate. Resolve that you’re going to experience a learning curve, pick a fear you’d like to unplug, and give it a first try…
An example of facing a fear with this triad of elements in mind is something I did this past winter. In case you don’t know I do communication skills consulting for work, and yet I have never been very comfortable (read: very UN-comfortable) soliciting new clients. As I worked on the Fear Mastery framework and writing this last 12 months I realized that this was a great opportunity to practice what I was preaching. I resolved to spend some time every day during the week (an hour, no more) reaching out to people I had worked with in the past, and soliciting from them potential leads for new business. Even making this decision made me anxious – what if nobody said yes? What if people implied (or said outright) that I really didn’t have anything they could refer to colleagues and friends? (This with 7 years of repeated statements from clients about how my work had helped their team, how they were using the material I had brought them years after the training I had done, etc.) What if… and so on.
I first needed to move this out of the mostly crisis frame I had this fear wrapped in (what if I don’t get any more consulting business? What if I run out of money? What if I have to work at Starbuck’s?) and decide that it was actually a series of problems to solve. That immediately generated some serious anxious feelings and physical responses. It took some effort just to sit at my desk and calendar the time to do this for that first week the weekend prior. I began finding reasons why I needed to wait just one more week, began to think of all the things I could do rather than chase down new business, etc. Isn’t it impressive how the Comfort Zone can quickly steer us away from even considering a fear challenge?
During that process I had some pretty interesting, even unnerving, bursts of fear – all of a sudden I’d think “this is pointless! Nobody is going to refer me! I’m crazy for even trying!” and similar highly useful thoughts. And of course I’d start to feel anxious and restless as a result. As Dr. Albert Ellis, the Father of Rational-Emotive thinking, said, “feelings come from thinking.” And they do. And they did! In the first couple of days I had to take breaks, start slow, remind myself that nothing dangerous or bad was happening, and that in the worst case (outright rejection, which of course in this context never happened) I could step away and start again the following day.
As the initial anxieties crested and eased I created a list of things to do for this work: develop a contact list, create a schedule for following up with those contacts, develop a method for tracking referrals as they came in, set up a calendar for contact dates and follow-up with people after a reasonable period of time, etc. Just that exercise helped shift my thinking – not much, but enough to start the ball rolling. The first few emails were scary. The next few emails were less so (with bursts of concern and worry still poking through as I continued this work.) Yet by that Thursday, of the very first week I was doing this work, I came to my desk and discovered that my worry was significantly less than it had been the previous Saturday, when I first started preparing to take on this project. By the middle of the following week I was finding it to be more comfortable than I had ever experienced, and (oddly enough) began to generate some new business.
Another example comes from an old and excellent friend who, for a variety of reasons, found himself seriously in debt to the IRS. (I know, just reading those 3 letters in sequence can be scary!) He had accumulated quite a debt to that agency, and had dithered (for over 9 years!) about addressing it. What if they threw him in jail? What if they took his house? What if he had to work four jobs and never, ever get to see a movie or have any fun ever again? He had himself really worked up over this, and attempted a number of things to shield himself from this fear, including some very serious drinking. He was completely terrified of having to call the IRS and deal with his debt.
Through a series of bumps and bangs that convinced him that he HAD to do something he faced into his fear and called the IRS. He reports that he was barely able to talk to the agent on the phone, but that when he finally finished his story the agent simply said “sir, please, just file your taxes. We’ll figure this out once you’ve done that.” He said his chief emotion when he got off the phone was anger – not at the IRS, but at himself, for having 1) taken so long to face this fear, and 2) all the time and energy he’d burned avoiding the problem.
And that’s EXACTLY the point, isn’t it? That in our (mostly unthinking, highly reactive) avoidance of what we’re afraid of we wind up giving up time, energy, freedom and room to live our lives, when (compared to what we spend in that avoidance) the facing through and dealing with our fears will take much less time and energy? It is unfair and unnecessary that we let our anxiety and fear rob us the way they can do. Next up – more examples, and further suggestions for tools that can assist you in using the triad.
115 comments
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June 25, 2010 at 2:28 am
Dan Ahern
Great stuff. Uncomfortably accurate. Like, “how did he know that I was going to read it! Who told him about me???!!!”. Painfully clear description of the fear ‘language’ that describes the feelings and thoughts. Especially like the one ‘…will I ever see a movie again and have fun?’. I’m there right now. Like being in a dingy on the ocean with passengers (family) and trying to grow the dingy into a sleek schooner piloted by a confident captain…. Thanks for this blog. Yep, uncomfortable as hell to read but it’s a source of hope.
June 25, 2010 at 2:44 pm
Erik Kieser
Dan – thanks for this comment. The whole blog is about hope – which sounds crazy, given how far from hope fear and anxiety can take you when you’re caught up in their vortex. It’s also remarkable to me how quickly you can climb out of that vortex with some clear tools and a little practice/effort. Keep pushing man – you don’t have to stay where you are.
June 30, 2010 at 1:36 pm
Dale
Thanks for giving us a language to sort through these feelings. I’m grappling with a problem that feels like a crisis; for the last few days I have fantasized (with increasing anxiety, however) about jumping on a plane or getting in the car and heading for the border. Classic flight response. Thanks to your advice, I’m taking the problem apart and setting goals against solving it instead of resorting to panic, where I’m more comfortable (hard to admit that). Kudos to you!
January 16, 2011 at 9:17 pm
Maggie
This popped into my inbox at exactly the moment I needed it. Thank you – you have no idea how much your work benefits others. 🙂
January 16, 2011 at 9:23 pm
Erik Kieser
Appreciate this comment Maggie! Glad this thinking/frame/information is proving useful to you. Simple tools and practice can yield a wealth of freedom and range of motion…
January 28, 2011 at 8:39 pm
Randy
I agree with Dan’s comment above…this is Great stuff. Yes very ‘painful’ I would agree but so ‘VERY’ helpful too! Here I always thought I was in this alone that nobody else was going through this same pain staking nightmare – called ‘Anxiety – Panick Attacks’. This is truly a ‘SOURCE’ of hope and ‘HELP’ thank you.
May 15, 2011 at 4:23 am
Bob
Ive been dealing with anxiety for just about 4 years and Ive always been looking for the doctors office fix. So…..If I read this correctly, I just have to tackle my stresses as a challenge and attack the things that make me anxious and or panic to overcome them? For example, I have a trip with my fiance planned for mid June and Ive been a negative jerk about going because I just know that we cant afford it and Im afraid that with my work situation being a seasonal worker, that well be doomed so Ive already pre determined that it wont be fun and it will be overly expensive. Not sure what to think? Part of me says screw it, have fun and cross that possible difficult bridge when you get there, and the other side says, dont put yourself in that predicament and miss the opportunity.
May 17, 2011 at 5:31 pm
Erik Kieser
Bob – you’re right. IF you’re not in actual danger than anything else you’re facing is a problem or problems to sort out and find solutions for. Doesn’t mean you won’t have anxious or even fearful responses. Also doesn’t mean those responses mean anything is really dangerous! From what you’ve said here you have some decisions to sort through – actual cost of the trip vs. what you can afford, your fiance’s wants, your concerns, and your job. This set of issues is a problem, or a couple of problems. Your fears about them (upsetting your fiance, losing your job, putting yourself in the hole financially) have you “running” – i.e., “being a jerk”, being negative, etc. But the only serious risk you run here (I would argue) is NOT facing your anxiety and sorting out the problems, then solving them. I suspect you have multiple solutions – delay the trip a month or two, negotiate a different trip with your fiance, save some money first, just for starters. Problem or problems vs. crisis.
Thanks for your comment – love to know how you sort this out.
November 10, 2011 at 4:14 pm
shandra
Thank you for writing this, it’s going to help alot of people. I didn’t notice my anxiety until i started taking blood pressure meds. I went to my doc and told him, so now i’m being weened off of it. I still get that nervous, and sometimes burning emptiness in my stomach. I think i worry too much about controling my blood pressure after i’m weened off of this medicine. I pray that the meds are the root of my problem and the anxiety will go away when off of it. It does feel good to know that i’m not alone. Wish you had group meetings or a facebook page or something like that!:)
November 11, 2011 at 5:02 pm
Erik Kieser
Shandra!
Thanks for your note here –
1) You are NOT alone. None of us that wrestle with fear and anxiety are alone. Conservative numbers in the U.S. alone say that it is one in ten of us – holy crap, that’s a lot of people wrestling with anxiety!
2) I’m certain that you’re right – that you’ve set up some fear/worry around your blood pressure. Doesn’t have to own you. Remember that those fears start in your thinking, whatever else you’re experiencing.
3) Feel free to hit me by email – erik.kieser@yahoo.com – if you’d like some support with this work.
4) I am working on your exact suggestions – facebook page and a way to do group meetings at the blog. Thanks for your thoughts about this!
Erik
December 31, 2011 at 6:47 pm
Natalie
Hi Erik,
I used to love flying as a child, but the last time I got in an airplane (10 years ago), I panicked and had to stop the plane from taking off, just so I could get off. (It was right after they shut the doors.)
How do I use these methods to fight the panic? I also have a terrible time in cars driving on highways and bridges–this is from a woman who used to drive cross country all the time! All this started during a messy marriage and divorce 14 years ago…please help! I’ve tried many different things, including meds (which I’m off now), and all of them were hogwash. I just want to be my adventurous, funny, life-loving girl again.
I have a very large beautiful family now, and I feel like I’m holding us all back by my stupid phobias!
January 3, 2012 at 4:03 pm
Erik Kieser
Natalie:
Thanks for your comment/question. First thing you need to know is that what you experience with planes and cars/driving is nothing uncommon – LOTS of people wrestle with these same fears. I’m going to write you a longer email response this morning, but a summary note for this blog comment is these fears are every bit as responsive to the techniques outlined in this blog as any other fear/anxiety issue a person might face.
It looks like this: you have developed a hefty Comfort Zone response to fear of falling/fear of an accident. The work needed here is to “unplug” the crisis thinking you’ve (unintentionally) trained yourself to do around these issues, and convert it back into problem thinking. A large part of your struggle is the fearful feelings/emotions you experience when you’re even thinking about climbing into an airplane, as well as the physical sensations I’m guessing you experience in your body when you fire up Flight or Fight.
You essentially spin yourself up (again, without intending to!) into terrified thoughts about what MIGHT happen if you climb on that plane or drive over that bridge. You have some Indefinite Negative Futures that you’ve landed on (no pun intended) and the MOMENT you start thinking about driving or flying you trigger your Comfort Zone to activate Flight or Fight, and now you’re scared.
Here’s the KEY thing to remember – this is ALL happening in your thinking. This is why medication can’t really solve the problem, not by itself. It can in some circumstances mitigate the Flight or Fight Responses we experience, and give us some emotional distance, while we work to confront and unplug our frightened thinking. But it can’t change our thinking for us.
SO – the work you face is making the decision to confront your thinking about flying and driving, enduring for a minute or two the rush of Flight or Fight Responses that will inevitably come when you do confront that thinking, and then, having survived that rush (and we ALL survive that rush, however much it freaks us out!) begin to patiently pull apart the fearful crisis thinking we’ve created the habit of falling into.
As I said, I’ll send a longer message to you by email today. If anyone who is reading this comment would like to see the longer reply let me know and I’ll turn it into a blog post!
February 21, 2012 at 9:04 am
Sopheaksom Kith
Hi Erik, i am an Asian living in Cambodia. I’ve developed this anxiety for about 2 years or so and it has been precluding me from enjoying life like everybody else who is mentally healthy. I guess my problem stemmed from the time when I studied abroad for the very first time, when I suffered from tremendous amount of stress from academic workload, loneliness and what have you. I didn’t realize i was developing whatever anxiety disorder though at the time i knew I was tense, I started to feel fearful for no reason while on the bus and even when i was washing my hand under tap water, i got a tense sensation. Worse yet, i almost got a panic attack when i experienced a turbulence during a local flight in australia — Thanks God i made it through! That’s perhaps the starting point of my flight phobia. Anyway, when I returned to Cambodia and reunited with my family, I had no time to remember all those problems and I never thought of myself having any anxiety disorder (mental disorder) whatsoever. For one full year, i was happy and busy with work and studies and I didn’t have room for my brain to think about all those problems. Not until when i had a drug reaction that made half of my back neck numb and the worst feeling popped up — “Oh my God, i was gonna faint! i was having a drug reaction!” From that moment on, the feeling is forever to stay in my head — I have developed this illogical fearful worry. I became scared crossing the ferry, I was scared on the bus (just scared for no reasons at all, not that the bus would collide in another bus or anything), and when i was on the road, i felt like i was gonna faint and who would send me to the hospital and would i die? That period was the worst in my life. My loved one went away abroad for one month and I was feeling so empty and lonely and scared and like i was trying to contact him all the time and when i called and couldnt get through, the worst of the worst feeling happened while i was on the road……….I never faint though! I was so so so devastated by these feelings and I lived with this worst condition for almost 8 months before i decided to go to a local psychologist. He asked me to describe about any events in life that would have trigger this disorder…..He told me I had OCD, which I didnt’understand at the time (I don’t know if i have OCD or GAD according to the circumstances I encountered in my life) And all he did for the next three months was prescribe me weird medicines which he told me were to neutralize my brain. I took his advice and took the medicines for 1 week for the first start and I couldnt see the result and i was like “Oh my gosh! this is getting worse”….I went back to him and he changed me a new set of drugs…It started to have some effect after a couple of weeks and I started to think a little positively….I hope that was not due to the placebo effect of the drugs……….I was wishing he would offer me some counselling on positive thinking or whatever, but unfortunately he didn’t do that. He only prescribed me drugs and asked me how i felt. After about 3 months, i felt better and I was determined to quit taking his medication. And so i did. I was without the medication for about three months before it relapsed. i think this time the cause was due to the stress generated by my concentration on the application for a scholarship. I spent days and nights working on the application after an exhausting day from work (shouting 5, 6 hours a day as a teacher at a uni). I got the worst feelin again – I was gonna faint, i was gonna die….gosh, the lump in my throat was making me feel so difficult, I found my breathing abnormal, it’s not in the natural order……There and then, i went back to the doctor and again retake his medication. He told me that the reason it lapsed was because i too soon quit the medication. So i took his advice and took the medicine for about four months until last September when I stopped and i had been fine until last week, when the feeling started to come back. I am feeling pretty gloomy. Like when the sky is gloomy, i feel i dont have a clear vision, I feel afraid, I feel the lump in my throat and I am scared and kind of hopeless thiking to myself what will my future will like if i am sicko like this…..Its hard to tell my family when they think it’s all because of me myself that i am not strong as a person…..although my loved one understands me….I really am afraid of getting into a worse stage of anxiety. I don’t want to get back into that condition. I dont want to take medication again. Please help me!!!! Btw, i do’t know what’s wrong with me also. Whenever i feel sick physically, i tend to worry immediately and the crazy, illogical fear comes to me automatically. When it comes, it sticks. I can’t stop thinking about the stupid illogical fears. I think about the crazy scenarios, about traffic accidents of my family members blah blah…..I am so hopeless as a 26 years old living with this mental disorder. I am tempted to get the Triad Technique for 69 dollars but not sure if that would help me! Please Erik and everyone else, help provide your kind advice and solutions!!!!!!!!!!!!! THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
February 26, 2012 at 5:03 pm
Erik Kieser
First off, I’m glad you felt comfortable responding here on the blog. Nothing you’re describing is anything unusual, weird or unexpected. You are in the grip of anxiety – end of story. Let me say that again: you are dealing with anxiety, and EVERYTHING that you’re experiencing – your physical symptoms, your emotional responses, all of it. So start there with your thinking about this draining, frustrating, maddening issue – the baseline issue is anxiety, pure and simple. Fear would lead us into thinking there is some horrible problem, some disaster just waiting to happen to us in our bodies (or worse, that we are somehow going crazy, losing our mind.) That’s all crap! 🙂 Whatever your fear is telling you, trust that you’re doing classic anxiety.
That’s great news, because anxiety (as you know from reading this blog) starts in our thinking. It doesn’t limit itself to that – our Flight or Fight Responses in our body and feelings become big, scary monsters to us – but the problem starts in our thinking. And anything that starts in our thinking can be addressed/corrected in our thinking. You said something very interesting early in this note. You said that you suffered a large amount of stress from studying aboard – loneliness, academic stress, etc. You wouldn’t be the first person to develop anxiety in the midst of something as large and envelope-pushing as studying abroad, and you won’t be the last!
But more importantly you were on your way to that anxiety before you ever left home. Those of us who fall into this battle with anxiety and fear get set up for it years before we get caught up in it. We have learned along the way to make a classic thinking mistake – we learn to turn a problem (some situation or issue that we want or even need to address) into a crisis (something that feels very scary, that feels like it can hurt or even destroy us.) Sooner or later we get caught up in some problem-turned-crisis in our thinking, and we start down the rabbit hole of the Chronic Anxiety Cycle (which I’m sure you’ve also read about in the blog.) And from there it is only a matter of time before we are wrestling with ongoing worry, fear and endless anxiety, and all the accompanying responses (especially the ones that scare us) of our Flight or Fight Reflex.
You are not going crazy. You are not fighting some esoteric or mysterious illness. You are, at the moment, the prisoner of some frightening fears about the future in your thinking. You don’t have to stay here. You have the mental and emotional capacity to break that thinking and get free of your on-going anxiety.
That will take a little work, and the acquiring of a few skills. It isn’t complicated, but it does take some energy and time. I’m starting a series of blog posts on those skills, the ones we need to bust fear, and that’s what I’ve called on the blog the Triad Technique. I don’t know what you were referring to about buying the Triad Technique for $69 – I don’t have anything to sell on this blog, at least not yet! 🙂 I am very happy to do a coaching session with you, but there isn’t any technique to buy. There are a small handful of skills that you need to practice – that’s it.
I will review those skills in the next several weeks. I am also happy to do a quick summary for you by email if you want. And if you want to do a coaching session we can arrange something by phone or Skype.
I know this sounds hard to believe right now – but you’re gonna be OK. I know you’re tired, I know you’re sick of being afraid, I know you want this to stop RIGHT NOW. I was where you are now, and I was there way, way too long. I was convinced that I would never, ever get free of the fear and worry, and that I would never be able to live a normal life. I was wrong. I did, and I am. You can too. You can’t make this go away overnight, I’m sorry to say. You took years to get to this place, and there is no magic wand to wave. But that’s actually GOOD news – because with some work and practice (really only a matter of a few weeks, with regular effort), you’ll begin to pull the plug PERMANENTLY on your chronic anxiety.
I will send you an email as well, in case you don’t check back here. Thanks again for writing what you wrote here at the blog! You’re gonna beat this anxiety –
Erik
October 5, 2012 at 6:08 pm
Sarat
I amm going thru the same thing.I.had no problems flying or driving before but after my fiance left me for a job in another state and starting nursing school in another state all these fears ,anxiety and panic attacks are taking over my life.I am talking to.a counselor right now but i’m scared i’m just hopeless and will end up in a mental home.please help
October 6, 2012 at 8:17 am
Erik Kieser
1) Thanks for your note!
2) You are dealing with classic anxiety, and you will NOT end up in a mental home – although I know from my own experience it can feel that way. You are feeling overwhelmed, ungrounded, and the panic attacks are a natural reflection of that.
3) I’m sending you a direct email in addition to this note here at the blog, but here’s a couple of things to think about:
a) You have one (or more likely multiple) thoughts that are scaring you – i.e., you are asking yourself “what if?” questions about the future that are scaring the pants off of you. You are projecting dark, frightening, hopeless outcomes in your future, and of course that it is making you anxious.
b) This is what I call converting one or more problems (challenges, concerns, worries, issues) into a crisis (life and death, this will be the end of you, it is hopeless, you’re doomed.)
c) When we do that we activate Flight or Fight in our brains and bodies, and that danger coping mechanism then tries very hard to get us away from the danger we’re thinking about. Here’s the rub: you can’t escape your own thinking. You can escape (or fight, if you have to) dangers in the natural, physical world. But danger you have created in your thinking you can’t run away from. And THAT is where chronic anxiety and panic attacks get their start.
d) In addition the Flight or Fight responses you have to your fearful thinking are now scaring you as well – physical and emotional.
e) SO – your mission is to both start “unpacking” your fearful thinking – reframe your crisis thinking as problem thinking – and to “unplug” your fears about your Flight or Fight reactions – i.e., they don’t mean anything, they can’t hurt you, they are just responses to your fearful thinking.
4) This takes some patience, work and practice – it doesn’t usually get sorted out overnight. 🙂 I’m sorry to say! But you can see some significant progress pretty quickly with some steady and patient work.
5) Like I said, I’ll write you directly as well. In the meantime I’m sorry you’re feeling this way – know you DON’T have to keep feeling this way. You can manage this, however you’re feeling at the moment –
Erik
April 18, 2013 at 8:26 pm
Kristin
Please post your longer reply as a blog post; I too suffer from severe panic attacks when driving over bridges and on highways. Lately I’ve been avoiding routine travels out of fear (really irrational fears, like my steering wheel will dislodge while driving, or I’ll get trapped inside my car with no way out.) I have no idea where thus is coming from or why it’s happening. I’d appreciate any wisdom about how to overcome this affliction.
May 1, 2013 at 8:15 am
Erik Kieser
Kristin:
1) Let me encourage you to read the following sets of blog posts to get a MUCH clearer map of both why you’re fighting the fear you’re fighting, and what you can start doing about it:
12/2/11 – 2/18/12
3/2/12 – 6/18/12
The first set covers a basic framework/map of what anxiety is and how it works, and the second set covers the toolbox as it stands so far. Please feel free to hit me with any questions you have in that reading.
2) I encourage you to read those posts rather than launch into an explanation in this answer. To briefly answer your question however the bottom line is you learned, largely or mostly unconsciously, to convert the challenge of crossing bridges/driving highways as a crisis – that it could, literally, kill or injure you – rather than see it for what it is – at best a problem to solve.
The result of that fearful thinking is that you’ve been firing up Flight or Fight, that ancient physical defense mechanism every human being has, and you have been scaring yourself over and over about this challenge – even just thinking about it now scares you.
Here’s the good news: you taught yourself (not intentionally, obviously!) to be afraid of bridges and highways, and what you’ve taught yourself you can unteach yourself, or rather retrain yourself to think about differently.
3) Once you’ve tackled some of the reading let’s start an email dialogue about this fear and get you moving! NO charge for email exchanges.
Looking forward to hearing from you –
Erik
May 1, 2013 at 11:11 am
Kristin
Erik,
Thank you for reaching out; it means alot. Since I posted on your blog, I have been forcing myself to get out there and drive. Some days I’m okay, some days, well, not so much. I missed out Meatloaf Monday with my husband this week (a time honored tradition!) because I couldn’t get on the highway, haha. I was so angry with myself, I cried the whole way home! However, later that evening, I made myself drive to a department store to run an errand (back roads), and I did not panic once, not even at the dreaded red lights. The unpredictability is both strange and exhausting.
I will read your suggested blogs and then email you. I look forward to our future conversations. Thank you sincerely again for your response.
Kristin
May 2, 2013 at 6:44 am
Erik Kieser
I’m looking forward to hearing from you as well! The work WILL make things somewhat unpredictable for a while, as you both challenge your fearful thinking and deal with the backlash in your Flight or Fight responses AND the energy drain you’ll experience. PLEASE hit me with questions or if you just want to talk this stuff through when you’re ready!
Erik
January 9, 2012 at 3:34 am
Nicole G
Hi Erik,
I am so lost in my life right now. My anxiety started after I had my son a few years ago. It started mostly in social situations and then escalated into my everyday life. It doesn’t matter where I am, I am ALWAYS worried about what could happen to me. I was sitting on my couch the other night and my heart was beating faster than normal and sent me into a panic thinking I was having a heart attack. Earlier that day I was walking into the gym feeling GREAT and anxiety free and all of a sudden I felt so dizzy and again sent me into panic. This has become SO debilitating. I feel like it’s affecting my parenting, relationships, scholastic career. I always thought I was going to do huge things wtih my life and at this point I can barely make it through my college classes. Please help me understand why this is happening to me. I have been to several doctors because I swear that there is something they are missing and they keep telling me no. I don’t know how much longer I can go through life feeling this way.
January 9, 2012 at 3:51 pm
Erik Kieser
Nicole: Thanks for your comment here. First off please know that there’s nothing weird, unusual or strange about you or what you’re going through right now. This is classic anxiety/panic attack stuff, and you don’t have to keep going through this.
I understand the visiting the doctor thing! The Flight or Fight Response (which you can read about here at the blog, just in the last couple of months for a good basic review of this issue) does all kinds of wacky things to our bodies, feelings and thinking, all in a desperate effort to get us away from whatever is scaring us in our thinking. So hear me when I say, however scary or unnerving that racing heart and feeling dizzy feels to you, it is only your Flight or Fight Response acting to get you running from what is scaring you.
So what IS scaring you? This isn’t always apparent or easy to figure out at the start. It is interesting and revealing that you mention two triggers – the birth of your son (congrats, by the way) and social situations. The next thing to hear in this response is that we don’t HAVE to be conscious of scared or frightened thinking to BE scared or frightened. A great deal of our thinking, especially the stuff that rattles our cage, can be out of our conscious awareness. That doesn’t mean we can’t make it conscious – it is just that it can be, at the beginning, hard and scary all by itself to make that effort.
Be clear that you have two-three-four themes or topics in your thinking that have you frightened, frightened enough to generate panic attacks. You are not going crazy, and I’m guessing, since you’ve seen several doctors, that there isn’t anything wrong with you physically. Many women have depression/anxiety after they give birth. If they in addition have things (like social situations) that they’ve learned historically (and mostly unconsciously) to be anxious around the situation can escalate into the kinds of problems you’ve having. You’ve developed some strong Comfort Zone boundaries around one or more issues, and those boundaries are keeping you afraid – until you sort them out and unplug that thinking.
I am happy to have longer conversations with you by email or by phone, whatever works for you. Let me encourage you to review the blog here for the last couple of months – I have been reviewing the basics around why we become afraid and what we can do to unplug that fear – that’s good information for you.
You DON’T have to go on feeling this way! Your life isn’t over! You CAN get through those college classes – I know that because I myself was in graduate school when this came crashing down on me, and I not only got through my classes but got my M.A. You can do it too. It will take some work and a little time to master the small set of skills you need to be a Fear-buster, but it is completely something you can do.
Please, hit me at my email address – erik.kieser@yahoo.com – and we can discuss this further. You’re not alone, and you don’t have to deal with this by yourself alone!
January 11, 2012 at 2:18 pm
gill
Oh my Goodness, I cannot believe that I have stumbled across this site. I could have written Nicole’s story myself. I have been suffering from exactly the same symptons for the past 6 years. So alone, so frightened and so helpless. So, I hope you dont mind Erik if I tell you my story in the hope that it may help someone else and/or that you may be able to offer some guidance.
I am 48 years old, married with 3 teenage children. Up until 6 years ago I was a fully functioning nurse/midwife/child protection advisor and partway through an MSC in public health. I had huge ambitions and had planned my career to the Nth degree. Unfortunately I was involved in a particularly nasty child protection case in which I was verbally assaulted In the clients home and threats made to my children. Fortunately I managed to escape before any physical damage was done. However, I was totally unsupported by the UK health service at the time – they wanted to brush it under the carpet and would not help me prosecute the offender as it would highlight significant inadequacies in the service. To cut a long story very short, I ended up having 6 months off work ( the first sickness I had ever had). and that was when my life changed forever.
My GP prescribed anti depressants but I wouldnt take them. I dont believe in covering up a problem and so I embarked on doing my own research. And anyway I didnt really believe that I was depressed or anxious. I just thought that my worrying about everything, palpitations, dizziness and fear when away from home was my body recovering from the trauma. I stayed indoors for the majority of that 6 months and I became a shadow of my former self. I did go back to work but on a part time basis but I never got to finish my MSc. I only have my dissertation to complete but cant find the inclination still.
Minor outings became a traumatic event. I would get real unease, dizzy spells and feel I was going to pass out when I was getting ready to go anywhere. I have losty count of the amount of times I have cancelled hair appointments etc. Supermarkets and Shopping Malls were and are a huge problem for me. I become engulfed in a state of dizziness and a real urgency to get back to the car. So,I avoid them as much as possible and instead spend hours on the internet researching my symptons. I have had every blood test done, MRI, Echo etc.
4 years ago we got an opportunity to come to Australia through my husbands job. I havnt worked for all of this time and my symptons are worsening. I try something new every couple of weeks. I used to go to the gym a couple of times a week but when I started getting lightheaded and palpitations I was sure I had a heart problem. So I had an exercise echo – it was normal. I spend a lot of time checking my pulse now – just in case. I started a running programme instead. I was fine for a few weeks and then I became breathless after one particular run and my muscles felt heavy and so I was convinced I had Chronic fatigue syndrome.
I had a course of CBT before I came to Australia (the only thing that the NHS did for me) but I found that it just made me focus so much on my symptons that they worsened. I meditate occasionaly, I walk the dog but I still sometimes feel paralysed in my life. I am desperate to re- engage in a career and realise all those ambitions I used to have but am so frightened that I may not be able to get through a day without collapsing/dieing. I take numerous supplements in the hope that tomorrow they will have worked. But then in the morning I realise I just feel the same.
Sometimes, I feel like a prisoner trapped in my body – just waiting for something to happen. It is quite odd because I love being around people. I always feel better in myself and less preoccupied with me. But in order to get out – I experience so many symptons that I am sometimes exhausted when I get there.
Crikey, I have just re read what I have written and I am shocked. Please be reassured that I do have some good days and I am managing to maintain a relatively ‘normal’ mumsy existence – it is just not what I wanted for myself and it is not the role model I so wanted my daughter to have.
Thankyou for your time.
January 11, 2012 at 3:38 pm
Erik Kieser
Thank you for this note! You don’t need to reassure me or anyone about anything you’ve written in this note either – I appreciate very much your honesty. You have said some key things here – chief among them the temptation most of us who wrestle with anxiety and panic have, about focusing on the symptoms of our Flight or Fight Response in our body and feelings.
You don’t have to stay stuck/trapped. You can get out of this. Please review the blog, especially my recent review (which I’m still in the middle of) concerning the basics of the Chronic Anxiety Cycle. You’ll want to check out the posts about Triad work – the meat of confronting and unplugging anxious/fearful thinking. Also check out the video from last Thursday – I think you’ll find that useful too.
I’m happy to have a longer exchange about your work at my email address – erik.kieser@yahoo.com. Please feel free to write me there!
January 18, 2012 at 12:28 am
Natalie
Nicole and Gill, I have had the same type of restricting problems, and some of them I’ve already “conquered.” So, even while I’m still “wrestling” I can tell you that you can get over this and you will feel more like yourself again. I have to say, when I found this blog, thanks to a lot of physical tiredness and wrong eating (junk food, etc.) and losing faith, I had begun dropping right back into the old fears….and I was scared that I would be back at the bottom of the “ditch” again….but thanks (I am believing prayer led me) to Erik’s blog and his words, I am climbing back up again.
It seems some days that I take 1 step forward, and then the next day 2 steps back….but I do know that I’m better than I was 6 weeks ago. I want to begin driving the car again and go all the way to taking a plane to Hawaii–of course, not in the same week—I’m sure it’s going to take steady time, but it CAN happen—I’m telling myself that…I’ve got 6 kids that want us all to vacation in Hawaii when the 6-week baby is old enough to remember! I can’t tell them NO, and so either I’m going to be “put to sleep” for the entire trip (if only, right! LOL) or I’m going to get over this. Oh…and it’s a long trip–we’re on the East Coast!
January 18, 2012 at 6:35 pm
Erik Kieser
Natalie: Thanks for your wonderful comments here! It makes me want to jump up and down to hear that you’re feeling like you’re more yourself and that you’re making progress. Means the world to me! 🙂 And thanks for the encouragement to your fellow fear-busters – can’t get enough of that either.
You WILL reach your goals with this work. You’re going to Hawaii, and you’re going to look back and shake your head, and wonder out loud “why was this so challenging?”
January 19, 2012 at 5:08 pm
Neshelina
Dear Erik,
I’m 23 and struggling with anxiety for three months. Life turned into hell, and I feel like a different person. I have health problems, anemia and problems with the thyroid gland as well as lack of vitamin D. But every doctor told me that my health problems did not cause my anxiety. It just started one normal day when I had my first panic attach out of the blue. Since that day I am housebond, barely go out, and I have managed to be ok at home and did not have an attack for a month now but still have a problem going out since I have developed agoraphobia. and it is my biggest problem now and I do not know how to treat it and what is the best approach. I keep thinking about how I was a normal person three months ago and now I am here in this situation. I hope with all my heart that you will and help me by answering me here at least a little. I am sorry for my bad english I am from Europe and would be so thankful for your words. All the best, in advance I’m grateful
January 19, 2012 at 5:30 pm
Erik Kieser
Yikes. I know EXACTLY where you are Neshelina. I reached that whole agoraphobia thing in the winter/spring/summer of 1995, and it was one of the worst experiences of my life. I felt trapped – literally trapped – in my house. (Which, being a double-wide trailer in one of the less-attractive parts of the town where I lived wasn’t exactly a great situation.)
Couple of things:
1) I would listen to your doctors. They’ve probably done their work pretty well, and if they say your health problems didn’t DIRECTLY cause your anxiety, I suspect they are right. It was certainly the case with me.
2) Although it feels like your anxiety and panic attack came out of the blue, the truth is you’ve been working up to this for a while. It takes time to develop the place where you are fighting panic and agoraphobia. It doesn’t have to take a long time to get OUT of that situation, but it definitely takes time to get there in the first place.
3) Please read through the blog, especially the posts this fall that are my current review of the Chronic Anxiety Cycle. The bottom-line is that you have a small collection of things you’re thinking about that rattle your cage, scare you, unnerve you, and you have been trying to solve them as if they were crises (life and death, had to get answered or you would get hurt) when they are actually problems (issues that need time, energy and planning to resolve, but which are not life-threatening.) Please also read about the Flight or Fight Response posts here on the blog – this will make more sense once you’re read those posts.
4) I will also respond to your email from this morning, but this is where to start. Very happy to start an email exchange if you need further clarification/suggestions on how to proceed.
I’m VERY, very glad you’ve joined us here at the blog. You don’t have to stay afraid. I know you’re tired, frustrated and anxious at the moment. You can get yourself out of this. There isn’t a magic fix – it will take some work and effort and a little time. But it is completely within your reach.
Erik Kieser
February 24, 2012 at 2:17 am
naomi
Hi,
reading this blog was very scary and comforting both at the same time. I’ve been suffering from severe anxiety for 6 months, and milder more managable anxiety for about 4 years.. seeing that people have been suffering for their whole life absolutely terrifies me as i don’t think i could do that. I cant bare to think of it. I am absolutely desperate for a way out, i have tried hypnosis, meditation, and am now waiting for CBT (have been waiting for almost 6 months! 😦 ) All this talk of overcoming your fear, and going outside your comfort zone, but i have only a few main fears, their all based around control i think, as there things like travel, lifts etc.. all things where im not in control, but apart from that, i just have sever anxiety when im in places and situations even where i should find comfort- home, with family and people i love etc.. i struggle to find comfort in anything. So how do i go beyond that? And i will occasionally have a good week, which will feel great! Then find i will just relapse into an even worse state then before, which every time just makes you want to give up hope. Its exhuasting. And i feel like im just dragging everyone down around me..
February 28, 2012 at 10:13 am
Erik Kieser
Naomi – just wrote you an email – please let me know when you get it. I have responded to your note!
March 25, 2012 at 3:02 pm
Natalija
Hey Erik,
I’m 19 and I’ve been dealing with this thing which I’m not sure what it is, either depression or OCD for 7 months already. When I look back on my life I’ve had some obsessive thoughts but one at a time and then it would stop or I’d continue my life once I solved it. This time though, it was like one thought triggered all of my other ones and they can’t stop. Some weeks ago I felt it was going away but now it’s back and I feel like I’ll never get over it. I have constant fears about how I’ll go crazy or about(even now) how when I’m writing this everything is gonna be a scam and everyone will know my problems, or when I read something all of the negative stuff immediately transfers to me like if someone’s done something bad I’ll be like “Oh my God what if some day something changes in my head and I go and do stuff like that”. Also I care too much, and put everyone’s weight on my shoulders. I used to be sooo sociable but now I avoid talking to people and going out because all of these fears! All these thoughts constantly dry me out, I feel tired and unhappy and I feel that there is no one I can turn to that can understand me. I don’t really have much money for therapy and I wouldn’t want to be one of those people addicted to medications so I would really appreciate some advice from someone about how to deal with these thoughts when they arise and how to make them not affect my life so much.
March 26, 2012 at 6:58 am
Erik Kieser
Natalija:
Thank you for your comment here at the blog. Let me encourage you first to start reading through the blog post series I’m working on right now, and which began with the title “Skill Set for Fear Mastery, Part I”, several weeks ago. I think this will help you get a good starting handle on what you’re wrestling with, and also clarify for you that you don’t have to be afraid like this – that you can and will get over it, with a little work, practice, effort and patience. 🙂
Notice a could of things you’ve said:
1) That you have certain feelings – and that it feels like you’ll never get over it, and
2) That it seems to be your thoughts that start the whole ball of wax rolling in your head.
You’ve identified exactly what the problem is: that you have a series of thoughts that scare you (What if this happens, what if that happens, what if…), and that in turn generates Flight or Fight in your body and in your emotions. All of that Flight or Fight stuff evolved to help you run away from immediate, physical danger – not from frightening thoughts.
There is no scam here, except in your thinking! 🙂 What I mean is that your thinking is taking you up into the future, into frightening scenarios that freak you out, and the scam is that even though it FEELS like something bad is happening or about to happen, the truth is there’s nothing wrong. Fear is building on fear, worry is building on worry, and all of it is shutting you down and immobilizing you.
You don’t have to live this way. It will take a little time and work to beat this obsessive thinking and worrying, but it is very much work you can do -any of us can do. Again, read through the posts I’ve recommended, then go back and read the blog from November of last year up to the Skill Posts. I think you’ll take away a wealth of information that you can start using.
And by all means, hit me by email if you want to clarify or discuss this any further – very happy to help! 🙂 erik.kieser@yahoo.com. I know how draining and frustrating this crap is – believe me, I know. Believe me also when I say you don’t have to stay in that place. Or don’t believe me – that’s OK too. 🙂 Believe me or not, try out these tools and see that they work for YOU.
Thank you again for the note, and keep me posted!
Erik
December 10, 2012 at 2:43 pm
jacko1000
Hey erik my names jack and im 18yrs of age…. i currently have alot of stress in my life, parents breaking up $10000 in debt and a baby on the way… for the past year ive been fighting heart pulpatations and feeling like im gunna faint in open places when walking…. it got that bad that one day i did faint and had a ceisure and split my head open….Its now a year later and its gotten that bad i cant go further then 20metres in a car without telling them to turn around.. I feel like im gunna faint and have a ceisure coz my heart races so quick….My neck and my back gets this real weird pain in it whenever it happens as well, its like everything tenses up and i cant breathe! I went from almost making first grade rugby league for australia to not being able to leave my house at all, all in a year, no1 knows whats wrong and i feel so alone… its getting that bad that alls i have to do is read something scary or having someone talking to quick in front of me and i feel like im gunna drop… weirdest feeling ever and i cant do anything about it… even watching someone go down a mountain slope on tv makes my heart race and i have to look away coz i feel like im going down it with them….. seriously my life is in hole that ifeel like im never going to get out of, like im worried about going to the hospital the day of my baby being born coz im scared im gunna pass out…. ? i cant live like this no more im only 18 and i feel like i have the heart of an 80yr old …. My email address is in_xtc_24-7@hotmail.com if u could email me directly to that if u think u could fix my problem…
December 13, 2012 at 9:22 am
Erik Kieser
I do think your problem is fixable! You’re in the grip of classic acute anxiety. Been there, did that. (So have most of the people that are reading this note!)
I wrote you back at your email address. Be clear on one thing: everything you’re dealing with comes down to anxiety. Which, weirdly, is good news. We’ll get that anxious thinking you’ve been doing unpacked, and we’ll get you to “discount” the Flight or Fight responses that are scaring you so much, and you’ll be amazed at what happens.
Looking forward to hearing back from you!
April 24, 2012 at 7:37 am
Michelle Teoh
Hello there. I’m 17 this year and I don’t reckon I suffer from severe anxiety, but it’s still anxiety and it’s still inconvenient all the same. However, most of my anxiety attacks stem from fear over my health. Like any physical uncomfortableness always makes me think I’m dying, which is ridiculous, but not to me. How do you think I can deal with that? Because I can’t simply just sit down and “plan things out” over a possible disease. Even when I consulted my family doctor, I was still unconvinced and thought there was something unduly wrong with me.
April 26, 2012 at 9:51 am
Erik Kieser
You’re VERY right Ms. Michelle – it IS still anxiety, and dang inconvenient. 🙂 And, because it is the same, rather chronic (like panic attacks or depression) or just a pain in the butt, it still has the same origins, and the same solutions.
First, you are carrying some worry about the future. You are doing what the anxiety literature calls “what ifs?” in your thinking. What if you get really sick? What if you don’t attend to a particular symptom and it turns out to be a disaster? What if THIS time it is really serious? What if the doctor missed something? Etc. I’m assuming you recognize at least a couple of these what ifs from your own thinking… 🙂
SO – first order of business is to attend to those what ifs. You are, by asking those questions, scaring yourself to some extent. Which reinforces the need to be what could be called “hyper-vigilant” – i.e., constantly monitoring your physical condition to make SURE there is nothing going “wrong” with you or your body. Which ALSO feeds your anxiety – yes?
And – I suspect – you have learned some trepidation over specific physical sensations – one or two or three – that in particular worry you or make you over-concerned.
I would argue that you know the PRECISE moment when you cross over from productive concern – i.e., see the doctor, eat well, get sleep, etc. – and move into unproductive worry. It is stopping that needless worry that is your mission:
1) You have finite control over your safety. That isn’t a message our fear wants to hear, but you can only what you can do. And in fact the more you relax the LESS likely you are to make yourself sick from worry (not to mention help your immune system – which doesn’t function well under on-going worry and anxiety.)
2) You want to practice challenging those what ifs. Sure, you MIGHT develop some rare illness, or get cancer, or whatever. When you say “any physical discomfort makes you think you’re dying”, you’re not here in the present – you’re up in the future, worrying over what MIGHT happen. Start challenging those worries, calling them into question, really thinking them through.
Another way to say this is that you’ve convinced yourself, unintentionally, that your worry will somehow keep you safe. But what WILL keep you as safe as you can possibly be is productive self-care, regular doctor visits, eating smart, and engaging your life with your interests and passions. Anything else can only generate anxiety, and that can only, in the long run, make it MORE likely you’ll fight unnecessary illness and physical challenges! 🙂
3) You want to start “discounting” those physical sensations that worry you. If you have a pain, well, you have a pain. 🙂 If you have a pain for 3 days and it seems to be getting worse and worse, by all means see the doctor. You will need a little practice at this discounting, because right now you’re still being very attentive, even micro-focused, on every sensation you experience that worries you, yes? Not necessary. To be alive is to have aches, pains, and weird things in your body experience. Just part of being on the planet.
4) I would strongly recommend starting a journal for yourself. Are there patterns to your worry? Does this get worse during finals, or the holidays, or when your friends fight, or whatever? And is there something more to this than just physical concern? Is this how you’re managing other stresses, like fears about your career, or family, or money? This can be a fruitful source of information and thinking. Just spend a little time in the morning or evening thinking about when you worry about your body, what your specific concerns are, and if other thoughts suggest themselves to you in this writing.
Please let me know if this has been useful to you! You don’t have to keep worrying about your body! I encourage you to read the most recent series on the basic skills of unplugging anxiety here at the blog. Thank you for your note!
Erik
April 24, 2012 at 5:27 pm
Vasco Martins
Hello. I’ve only read this one post from your blog, but I felt I should already comment. I am now a 20 years old boy from Portugal. Since I remember, I’ve always been somewhat unconfident about myself, with lack of self-esteem. I’ve never been able to do presentations (anywhere) without being extremely nervous (and despite that fact, I’ve always had energie to make fun, one or another time, of friends when they were doing their presentations in school. Stupid me, I know). Of course, this is just one of the situations where I had lack of confidence. Anyway, in my last high-school year, I’ve started feeling more anxious and somewhat depressed, but nothing that would stop me from living my life. I “only” felt mostly unmotivated, but nothing more. Later that year, when I entered university, it happened. I had my first panic attack. I know I don’t need to describe what I felt, because everyone who reads this knows by now. I can only say it was the worst feeling ever. And it didn’t stop there. For the following 1 to 2 weeks, I experienced 2 more panic attacks and all the other side effects of anxiety. Dizziness, racing heart, lack of control, I felt like I wasn’t in myself, all the main symptoms. This happened shortly after I turned 18. Also, because it sure is important in all of this, I’ve dealt with more deaths in my family, and a loved friend (which was actually a girl I liked but was to stupid and immature to tell her), than most people have had in my age (I wasn’t sure where to fit this in the text). My mom took me to a neurologist she knew, who diagnosed it as being a panic attack and anxiety problem. I started my medication with seroxat for about 1 year and then changed it to fluoxetine for 6 more months. I eventually stopped taking it because, and although this might sound stupid and somewhat dangerous, my medication ended and I had no more prescribed at that time. I felt better, not like what normal people call normal, but I felt better. Summer started and I was trying to enjoy it as much as I could with my girlfriend, friends and family. On a small note, during this almost 3 years in university, I have done absolutely nothing! Anyway, this last year university started again (I had changed to a different one because I was in risk of being one year without the right to be rated(?) in uni, and still had to pay for it). I was feeling confident that this year was going to be the year I started taking some control of my life, in that subject, but I was wrong. In the very first class I had, I almost had a panic attack. I managed to control it, but it left me really devastated and sad. It was a hard day for me, dealing with that “unexpected” situation. Somehow, I managed to go back to uni one or two days later and attended about half of the classes. About one month later, still feeling very anxious, I (think) I injured myself while drumming (drumming is something I love but, as you would guess, is also very put apart in my life, sadly). I had a lot of pain in my arm and I though it could be tendinites (my mind was flooded in fear of not being able to play again or had to play with pain forever. Even though I didn’t really give the attention I’d like to drumming). I waited one week, played again and the pain came back. Went to the doctor (general clinic doctor) who told me it was tendinites. He gave me some meds to deal with the inflamation and pain, and said to take some rest. I did so, but decided I should go to a more specialized doctor. It turned out I have ulnar nerve compression in the elbow, in BOTH my arms (how lucky, right?). Stopped playing for about 4 months to see if it would help coming back to normal. Meanwhile, I had stopped going to school, and, to help with the fear party in my head, I found I had two cysts in one of my testicles (first though: cancer). Happily, their where benign and I had surgery to remove them. Still have pain nowdays, after roughly 4 months and 1 week, but I’m saying to myself that it’s normal. Anyway, going back to the main problem, lately I’ve been feeling a lot more anxious than normal. I feel like everyday is a struggle. I can’t do anything I want, except drumming (Yup, I’m drumming again, still with some pain and numbness, but it’s a sacrifice. Although I feel unmotivated, I’m trying to keep a practice routine). But, going to the coffee with friends, going out, going for a walk, everything basically! I still go out, but I’m always anxious, I’m always feeling symptoms and I can’t live a normal life. Of course, university is not a do-able option at the moment. Even the simple fact of going to uni by bus terrifies me! Luckily I can still drive and somewhat helps me relieve the anxiety. I see myself constantly with fear of dying, of being sick, of suffering (mainly this). Rationally, I feel that it is stupid to feel anxious about normal everyday situations, but my brain is too stubborn and my emotion don’t help at all. Oh well.. I still don’t know why I shared this, but I think it might help other people know that their are not alone (I could have explained myself better and more detailed, but that would be hard since english is not my main languange and it would most definitely bore some of you). And most of all, to always have hope, no matter how unreal it may seem. I’m still trying to find ways to get rid of it all, so tips will always be welcome! Thank you for reading this.
P.S – I sure used a lot of “I’s”, didn’t I? lol
April 26, 2012 at 10:05 am
Erik Kieser
Vasco: First off, thanks for putting your experience up here on the blog. It takes a certain amount of courage to do that.
After reading your note here I’m going to make a bold statement: whatever your specific experiences in the last few years, the bottom-line is you are carrying around some worry/anxiety habits. When you mention feeling a lack of self-confidence – when you talk about your worries about your arm or your private parts – when you talk about panic attacks and a general sense of fear – then you’re talking about anxiety.
Let me encourage you to read through the blog, and especially from mid-October of last year until now. I think you’ll find a ton of good information to help you start re-framing/re-thinking what you’re worrying about, and even better help you unpack and sort out and GET FREE of those worries.
I’m also very, very happy to trade emails with you if that’s useful to you.
I’m going to send you an email right now to let you know I’ve responded to this blog post.
You don’t have to keep on like this. You can in fact find your confidence, find your freedom from this relentless and tedious anxiety. You’re young, and you don’t have to give away much more time to this crap!
Again, thank you for writing –
Erik
April 25, 2012 at 6:46 pm
Anoushka
Hi Erik,
I have had anxiety since I can remember.
I have fought it since I was a child, the anxiety I feel has changed form over the years, it seems as I conquer one fear another appears in its place.
I must say the current one is a doozy.
As a child It started as a strong fear of vomiting so my parents followed this up with the Doctors visits etc, then when I was an early teenager I managed to conquer this feeling and so it manifested into a fear of passing out, I would feel light headed and need to lay down and close my eyes. Then this feeling of light-headedness changed to a feeling like I was out of breath and so I would try to meditate to regulate my breathing and try not to panic. From there it began to get dark, thoughts that I am loosing my mind fears of evil entity’s trying to take over my mind and I am currently praying that this one goes away because its particularly scary.
From the age of 7 I have had these and now I am 33 I can only say its getting old and I’m tired of living in fear of my own mind.
If you have any ideas how to help I would love to hear them.
Heres hoping,
Anoushka
April 27, 2012 at 8:21 am
Erik Kieser
Anoushka:
Many thanks for being willing/comfortable to put this note up on the blog – really appreciate it.
I GET how you feel! Anxiety like this is SO soul-sucking, energy-draining, debilitating. It is interesting to hear you say how much of this is focused, for you, on the physical responses of Flight or Fight.
I’m assuming you’re reading through the blog? Let me encourage you to do that if you haven’t started yet. In particular let me suggest that you look at the posts reviewing the Chronic Anxiety Cycle, and the posts since mid-November of this past year, for the framework you can use to beat this anxiety.
Let me assure you of two things:
1) The physical sensations that are stressing you are NOTHING except the responses of Flight or Fight to your fearful thinking. They have, now, become scary in their own right (because of association mostly) but they STILL don’t mean anything – literally. They are just the body gearing up to fight danger (mostly by running) and they don’t signal disaster, horror or anything evil. This is a VERY useful thought to start thinking on for you –
2) There is no evil entity trying to take you over! The only thing you’re fighting (and it is plenty, believe me) is that you have one (or more likely more than one) concerns/worries/problems that you’ve converted into sources of anxiety, fear and endless analysis.
Your work now is to start “unpacking” that thinking – to begin to identify the thinking that scares you/worries you, and start the process of seeing it for what it is – NOT a crisis, however scary it feels – but a problem, or series of problems, that you need to sort out and identify what you can do about.
Would be happy to trade emails if that’s useful to you – my email is erik.kieser@yahoo.com.
Please hit me if you want to discuss further. Read the blog, and please hit me with questions when/if you have them! Thank you again for your note! You don’t have to stay afraid…
Erik
May 2, 2012 at 6:22 pm
amanda
HI Erik,
I have just been reading all these posts and your answers on your website. You are a great person to listen and respond to all these people. I suppose I am one of them. Hard to write it down having kept it in for years. My problem is anxiety and probably panic attacks with needing to get to a bathroom urgently. I suffered with undiagnosed coeliac disease for decades, causing me unpredictable stomach problems every now and then. Being diagnosed is good – but when you get unexpectedly glutened it is a quick and nasty reaction that i began to fear. Now if I am more than a few minutes from a toilet I start to panic even though there is not a problem and I actually cause a very real problem where I have had accidents. For some reason this has intensified and become an everyday problem even on my way to work or to drop my kids at school. I have had to stop at public toilets 3 times this week half way through my 40 minute drive to work. I am always ticking in my mind where the bathroom is and I decline social events where there is no bathroom because I know if I think about it, it will become a very real symptom.
I know this is all in my mind, so why is mind telling me I urgently need to go to the toilet and creating a very real physical symptom that I seriously can’t control.
I am so embarrassed by this and to the outside world I look like a confident, organised, busy working mum and wife – on the inside I am constantly worried about the next event that requires me to be away from a bathroom.
Any advice would be appreciated, I haven’t sought any help with this and just battle it out myself every day. Can I get back to being normal again and not living with this stupid fear?
Amanda
May 7, 2012 at 6:56 am
Erik Kieser
I have sent you an email directly, but here is what I wrote you in case you get here first:
Thank you for your note. The short answer is yes, you can get free of this fear. I’m assuming you’re reading through or have read through the blog, so you understand the central idea that fear begins in our thinking. What began as a concern/problem in your thinking has morphed into some worry about some future outcomes, based on challenges you’ve faced in the past.
Your “Comfort Zone” – your personal boundaries to keep you safe – has a nasty, frustrating way of shrinking inwards – of making you less and less comfortable taking chances about a particular issue or worry. If 10 feet from danger is good, wouldn’t 20 feet be better – that’s the way the Comfort Zone operates.
Another way to put this is that you’re asking yourself, all the time, “what if?” What if you have to go and there isn’t a bathroom close by? What if you have an accident? What if you make a terrible mess and somebody gets upset with you? What if… I’m sure you can conjure some more in this direction, yes?
And every time you ask yourself “what if?” you generate some anxiety – even a lot of anxiety. You’re driving your thinking up into the future, and you’re predicting disaster. And when you do THAT you fire up Flight or Fight, and have to deal with the push-back from the physical and emotional warning signals that defensive system generates in your body.
The bottom-line is you’ve converted a problem (concerns about getting to a bathroom) into a crisis (this will be a disaster if I can’t reach a bathroom, and/or thoughts in that direction.) NO WONDER YOU’RE AFRAID – right?
This is why I talk about “unpacking” your fears/anxiety. Your mission is to covert that crisis in your thinking BACK into a problem – something to be addressed, managed and worked through, but not a crisis to be afraid of, obsessed over or run away from.
The reason is has been intensifying is that your constantly thinking about those “what if?” scenarios in your thinking. And be clear that you DON’T have to necessarily be conscious of that thinking – it is very easy for it to start being part of the background noise of your mind.
Please look at the most recent set of blog posts around the essential skills in unpacking anxiety. I am more than happy to recommend some specific battleplans/next steps for you if that’s useful to you – just hit me back here by email and I’ll do that. (And it will be a MUCH faster response, I promise.)
To review:
You have some concerns about bowels and bathrooms that you’ve turned into a crisis – something disastrous that isn’t.
Doesn’t make you weak or dumb – every person on the planet does this – everybody.
You are constantly worrying about the “what if?” scenarios you’re running in your thinking, conscious or otherwise.
Your worries are constantly activating your Flight or Fight Response, and so you’re having physical and emotional reactions to your fears.
You don’t have to stay here. You need to challenge that thinking, those “what if?” scenarios, and start converting this crisis in your thinking BACK into a problem to work on and deal with.
This isn’t something most of us do in one sitting. This takes some practice. Part of that practice is deliberately challenging and changing your thinking about your concerns – and that takes energy and a little time. That’s OK. You’ve been giving this some energy and time to get here – it will take a little time to get out of this. 🙂 But get out you can –
Erik
May 6, 2012 at 9:56 pm
Mike
Heya. I don’t think I need much advice since I’ve been reading top to bottom (though I haven’t checked the other posts yet), but I’ll throw my stuff out here too. I’m a 20 year old male, about as healthy as any other guy my age. About three months ago I tried marijuana for the first and only time. I had a bad trip that made me very anxious. (Which is why I never tried it again and will never try it again) Ever since then, I’ve been pretty anxious and dull. It wasn’t debilitating, but it was an aching fear of conspiracy and otherworldly things, haha. Anyway, about a month ago, I began having panic attacks. I had maybe 4 of them, I’d get lightheaded and felt faint, worrying about having heart attacks and cancer and aids and every disease under the sun at once. These were very debilitating, spending every waking moment for about a week worrying about when the next attack was coming and how soon I could get to the hospital. The attacks have since passed, but the anxiety lingers. Metaphorically speaking, I feel like the fire of anxiety has gone out, but the embers are still there, and I want to douse them before they engulf my life completely. Any different pointers you could give me? I don’t want to cause you too much of a finger strain by typing a huge thing out, you’ve been incredibly generous to everyone else already. Maybe just direct me to another reply? 😛 Thanks a bunch!!! –Mike
May 7, 2012 at 7:44 am
Erik Kieser
Mike: Sent you a reply directly via email, but here’s what I wrote you in case you get here first:
Thanks for your note. You experienced something pretty common with your “4/20” experience. Marijuana tends to induce a certain amount of anxiety/paranoia in lots and lots of people, whether or not they fight anxiety. It is magnified for people who do wrestle with anxiety.
You are describing a couple of things to me in this email:
1) The development of some “anticipatory anxiety” on your part – i.e., you’re worried about panic attacks happening without warning. Again, very common. Your work here is to challenge your “what if?” thinking about the possibility of panic attacks, and convert that into “so what?” Because ALL panic attacks are is Flight or Fight firing up to respond to danger – only there IS no danger. Just the physical and emotional symptoms of Flight or Fight. Period. Would be useful for you to identify (as you’ve done to some extent in your note) what F or F responses make you most anxious – i.e., racing heart, light-headed, etc. – and practice a conversation with yourself that those are just symptoms, however they feel – they don’t carry any real message of danger, you’re more than equal to coping with them, and the less you worry about them, the less likely they are to happen.
That takes a little practice. Thankfully you’re not very far into this cycle, so it probably won’t be any big challenge to get back out again.
2) You could be seeing the first surfacing of some anxiety you’ve been carrying for a while. I don’t know that, and you don’t need to infer special knowledge on my part! 🙂 I bring it up for you to consider, because if that’s the case, then there are other concerns you’ve transmuted into fears in your thinking, and you’ll want to pull those apart as well. Again, there is no danger here – just some thinking, potentially, that needs to get unpacked and sorted out. You might give this a little thought and see where it takes you.
Erik
May 9, 2012 at 4:06 am
Mark
Erik,
I wanted to first commend you on your work here on the fearmastery blog. You have helped a lot of people and I think it’s great how you are serving others.
So I wanted to reach out to you and explain a little bit of my story. I am a 32 year male and am married with no kids. I am an engineer and have been in the work force for around 9 years. My wife, along with my help, is trying to launch a health-food startup business. At any rate, I’ve been struggling with anxiety and depression on and off for 13 years or so. It seems every year I get severely depressed and anxious, and then recover and begin to enjoy life again. But everytime I’ve ridden this redicilious rollercoaster up and down, I’ve always medicated with SSRIs and underwent cognitive behavioral therapy. I start doing better, then stop the meds, do well for a while, then usually out of nowhere, bang! It strikes again. It always seems to be a vicious cycle. Well my anxiety is back again and life has been hell on earth for the last month. I am so fed up with it and just can’t understand why this keeps happening to a good guy like me. I have some really severe fight or flight symptoms. I get really awful heart palpitations, always wake up hours early, vomit most mornings, and just want to hide. I’m constantly tired, can’t concentrate, struggle with memory, I just seem to be going crazy. I don’t have the motivation to do a lot of the things I like to do and I can’t seem to do anything around the house, etc. Where I really struggle is how I think / process thoughts, and have poor cognitive abilities. I am convinced I am really inept, stupid, etc. People say, well you’re an engineer – you understand, right? Well no!!! That doesn’t always work like that. I feel so dumb when I talk to people. I do love interacting and joking with others, but it seems so hard and forced with me. I feel like I don’t have much to say so I withdraw. You’d think after 32 years, I’d have a lot of experience and knowledge to draw from, but it just doesn’t seem that way. It just seems so hard for me to interpret what is going on around me, process it, and convey these things in a meaningful way. For example: after seeing a movie, people are able to decompose the movie and talk about all the inner-workings. I will say something like “that was a good movie”. And I picture myself like a caveman: “Mark like movie”. haha :-). Basically I struggle all day long with this and other thoughts of never amounting to anything, to losing my job, to never succeeding at various skills or abilities, you get the picture. I just feel really stuck and don’t know how to improve myself.
This time around I am trying to really tackle the root of my anxieties. I’ve been reading a lot of your blogs, especially the part about overcoming and tackling the fears and pushing the comfort zone. I just find my situation kind of unique, because I don’t have fears of flying, driving, or scenarios like this, I just constantly have fear all day long – of life. Any advice you have – maybe you’ve had similar struggles? I just so desperately want to live a life where I don’t dread being awake all day long and want to enjoy myself a little and feel a little accomplished. Thanks
May 13, 2012 at 6:04 am
Erik Kieser
Mark: Thanks for your note. First off you’re clearly a smart guy – just this analysis of what you’re dealing with in your anxiety is an indication – very lucid and clear.
Secondly, you said some very interesting things here. You said that you “just constantly have fear all day long” – that it is only a vague, general fear – but then you also said that “I struggle all day long with this and other thoughts of never amounting to anything, to losing my job, to never succeeding…” so you actually do have some specific fears (and in fact any one of these fears can be more than enough to stop most of us in our tracks.) And, I would argue from what I’m reading here, you’ve been fighting these for a LONG time, which is pretty typical of those of us that do battle with anxiety. I would also argue from what you wrote that you’re doing battle with some pretty specific social anxiety fears – again, pretty stinkin’ common in the war with anxiety.
The SSRI’s are good tools, if they are used in conjunction with what you’ve heard me on the blog call “unpacking” the thinking that makes us anxious in the first place. To quote Mission Impossible your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to get that unpacking process sorted out. 🙂
Let’s trade some emails and get that process started.
Erik
May 15, 2012 at 1:19 am
Piyush
Hi Erik
I read your posts here and i really admire for your support for all the people here and i seek your help as well.
I am 27 year old male , Indian by nationality. Strong family and academic background and i recently completed my MBA from a very reputed institute in Asia. I have had wonderful last year with academics and have landed myself in a very good career opportunity.
I have usually been scared of things which are trivial . A small fight or altercation at work or around me, something that i have messed up, tends to bring out overwhelming responses from me. I tend to get worked up very quickly with these things. Excessive stress even brings out symptoms like fainting and nausea for me.
The main problem i want to talk about began around 2 years back when i was working with my previous organization. I had some sort of flu which got me sick for over 2 weeks with high fever, gastric upset and throat and chest infection. It took me a good 2-3 months to totally recover out of that illness. I was scared to my life about that being a severe form of fatal flu that was spreading in the region. Thankfully it wasnt so and i made a complete recovery.
Another episode of illness with my back lasted for over 2 weeks and caused tingling sensations in my toes and fingertips. The tests again revealed nothing but a very minor back strain.
Now since that particular episode of illness any form of illness takes a heavy mental toll on me. I end up thinking too much about it and tend to google up symptoms and try to make a rough connection with my symptoms and some random disease that may correlate to it. The surprise here is my parents are doctors and they have make all efforts to convince me that the disease isnt really that bad and i would recover out of it easily.
Currently, i have a break after academics before i begin my work in another week’s time. I have been facing weird symptoms since i got back home. I have had heart palpitations, tightness in my chest , slight breathing distress along with random pains in my chest and back. Since the symptoms were really alarming , i got all possible investigations done and sort the opinion of the best doctors in town. All the tests result negative and perfectly normal. Doctors tell me all those are because of stress. I cannot visibly feel any form of stress in my life given my current state. I have a good secure job in hand and a bright future ahead of me. Also i am currently enjoying a vacation and home so i dont really have any physical or mental stress. I have no reason to be stressed out but this what i hear from everyone i meet. I started Yoga and meditation and have been doing so for the last 3 weeks now. But it just doesnt take my mind off my feelings and symptoms. I tried taking a vacation with my family but had to return mid way due to the symptoms repeating. This has been stressing me and my family as well. Its making me really irritable but i can somehow not push these ideas of illness out of my head and i feel these are contributing to furthering my symptoms as well.
I am scared that these feelings might be a major hindrance in my professional growth and demeanor and i feel helpless and hopeless not being able to push out my illness off my head when i know that there is no major physical issue with me as confirmed by doctors
I have been trying to put my thoughts under control but the more i try , the more my mind becomes agitated. So i need your opinion how i could overcome this entire chain of thought which i am scared might hurt me physically as well as emotionally and could end up in a vicious circle.
May 18, 2012 at 6:54 am
Erik Kieser
Piyush:
First off, thanks for your note here, and congrats on all your success with school and work.
The next thing to say is that all the symptoms you’ve been feeling since you got back home are completely natural responses of your Flight or Fight Response. Heart palpitations, chest tightness, breathing distress, random pain – all of these are things that can happen to us when we’re afraid/anxious.
The bottom line is that you’ve got some specific fears that are in turn firing up Flight or Fight in your body. You touched on these when you said “A small fight or altercation at work around me, something that I have messed up, tends to bring out overwhelming responses from me…I tend to get worked up very quickly… symptoms like fainting and nausea…” If you read here in the blog you’ll see that I reference repeatedly that it is our thoughts that make us afraid, and so it is vital, critical that we identify what thoughts are making us anxious…
You say that life is good, and it sure sounds like it. Having said that it isn’t your CURRENT situation that is stressing you – it is fears/worries about what COULD happen in the future – what I call Indefinite Negative Future thinking. Those fearful thoughts about the future are what is firing up Flight or Fight in your body, and so the dance continues for you, until you sort out your specific fears about what could happen. I can make some guesses from what you said here. You have some fear or fears around relationships being disrupted or damaged (i.e., your fears about fights/altercations). I’m also guessing that you have some fears around future safety/security. These might be good starting points for some reflective thinking for you –
Permit me to recommend that you give yourself a little time over the next few days to sit with a journal, or your laptop, or however you prefer to sit and converse with yourself in written form. Consider the kinds of thoughts that might be frightening you. A couple of things to keep in mind:
1) These thoughts don’t necessarily have to be conscious thoughts. For most of us who have fought or currently fight anxiety we have had years and decades of practice at pushing away from our conscious thinking the fears that rattle our cage, and it can take a little work to get them back out “into the light” of our awareness. I’m not saying you need years of psychotherapy or anything – like I said, just start from the hints you wrote in this note here and see where you go. It may take several brief sit-downs/journal writing to get there, or it may come very quickly.
2) Expect your Comfort Zone/Flight or Fight Response to get pretty scratchy about this work. You could easily skirt anxious responses or even get seriously rattled doing this piece of work. That gives you a great opportunity to do one of the small handful of skills we each need to unplug/unpack our fears – in this case, doing what I call “discounting” your Flight or Fight Responses that scare you. Remember – Flight or Fight CANNOT hurt you. It can scare you – mostly because of what you’re afraid it is signalling – i.e., chronic or untreatable illness, or endless anxiety – but it doesn’t have any such meaning. It is just telling you that you’re afraid, and that you should get away from what scares you.
Please, by all means, feel free to write me at this address – erik.kieser@yahoo.com – if you’d like to discuss this further.
You can shake free of this, and it can happen much more quickly than you might now believe. It is my experience that those of us who wrestle with anxiety share the qualities of intelligence and strong sensitivity – great gifts, and also a fertile ground for anxiety (if we don’t have the tools we need to keep that from starting up in our thinking.) You are more than capable of doing this work.
Please, keep me posted on your progress and what is working for you! Thanks again for your note here –
Erik
June 20, 2012 at 6:26 pm
Gladys Peña
Hi Erik,
Good day Erik,
I’ve been having anxiety attacks when my boyfriend for 6 years left to work out of the country. He’ll be away for 8months. I have fear of being in a heavy traffic, fear of doing things that makes me happy. I was into pole dancing, but i’m scared to do it again because im scared of being stuck in traffic on the way to the studio, and might die in the streets. I’m having palpitations, shortness of breath and the feeling of lump in my throat.
One more thing, I’am a nurse by profession, before, I’m very swift and organized with my work. I can attend to sick and dying people, but now, if i see my patients dying, im having numbness of my hands. Why is that so? I know its part of the attack. I feel like a weakling brother, this ain’t me!!!!!! I just stay at home after work and fail to see my friends and go out..
I miss my boyfriend very much, i didn’t realize i became very emotionally attached to him. I want to get outta of this box! I wanna be better without taking any drugs. I want to have the life that I had. The happy life.. Help me please..
Thank you very much! You are such an inspiration.
June 22, 2012 at 5:11 am
Erik Kieser
Gladys:
Thank you for this note! I’ve responded to the direct email you sent me – please check your email and take a moment to answer the questions I’ve asked there. The bottom-line (as you already get from the blog, I’m sure) is that you are caught in a pattern of asking yourself “what if?” questions that are scaring you. In addition you’re having Flight or Fight Responses (numbness, racing heart) that are keeping you on edge/anxious – responses that are happening as a direct result of your anxious thinking.
Looking forward to hearing your response to your email. You CAN get free of this stuff –
Erik
July 11, 2012 at 12:03 pm
sharon
each day is a struggle. even counselling and this triad technique sounds too good to be true .
July 12, 2012 at 1:33 pm
Erik Kieser
I get the whole “sounds too good to be true.” I spent 20 years fighting this crap, and 5 years just about full-time (i.e., closing down work, social life, relationships, etc.) It is possible, very possible, to shake free of chronic anxiety. It takes some work, practice and time, but it is infinitely worth it.
July 11, 2012 at 12:16 pm
sharon
first i must say that i do treasure the gift and beauty of life ; that along with survival and need for comfort keep me going
the struggle is with this constant hyperactive feeling . even though i’m faring much better in life now – each day the random fears increase. and then panic ! oh god…im late,,,gotta get this done…gotta get that done. im always running late ‘ worrying. chain smoke. worry about my cat. my list of pending jobs. fear of no job. and then after work that one drag of marijuana relaxes me – i cant socialize like others on marijuana. I go into extreme lethargy.
i left my last job cause i thought this high pressure job of being a corporate publicist wasn’t right for me and my anxiety. Presentations were scary as f***. – although i am quite reputed and known for my strategy with media and marketing – i just throw great ideas. find it very hard to get it done. and now im freelancing – finally getting back up – but this freaking anxiety, lethargy and addiction. keeps hindering my progress – MY LIFE. so freaking confusing as to where to go for help. Pillsss i will NEVER TAKE AND NEVER WILL , but therapies …there are so many ! it all costs so much. what must one do ? i have managed to control the full fledged attacks via breathing technique ; self calming BUT NOW ITS CREEPING INTO MY EVERYDAY LIFE.
Some earnest advice ; practical advice would be great. Does this TRIAD method work. Why is it so expensive ! is it for real ?
July 12, 2012 at 1:36 pm
Erik Kieser
Sharon:
I replied to you directly at the email associated with your note here. Let me say in summary that except for phone coaching sessions there is no cost associated with this blog at the moment – and my first call is always free. Please see my email to you and let me know how you’d like to proceed.
And as far as earnest and practical advice, well, please reference here in the blog this spring and early summer the series of posts on the Skill-Sets for Fear Mastery. You’ll find plenty in the way of practical recommendations.
Erik
February 8, 2013 at 9:08 am
Josh
Hi Erik,
Just a note for clarification for some people. I’ve seen people mention this expensive “Triad” technique. I think they are confusing your fear-mastery triad with some scam on a website called the “calm clinic” which had claims of being able to solve various mental and social disorders by ordering costly programs there on their site one of which has gotten alot of scrutiny as a scam but also unfortunately a few loyal followers who swear it’s the best thing ever. It is called the triad technique. Rather than explain it all out here I’ll just attach the link to their ” free anxiety profile test” so you can check out this racket for yourself lol! By the way make sure to take the test all the way through twice. Saying you’re a male then going back and saying you’re a female! The result is quite amusing but I won’t spoil the surprise! As always Erik thanks for doing what you do and being on here. You have really helped me begin the journey of ending this anxiety trip and I feel a little better with each day of work. Keep it up and I’m sure I’ll talk to you soon!
http://www.calmclinic.com/anxiety-test/
February 10, 2013 at 12:16 pm
Erik Kieser
Josh:
Can’t thank you enough for this note. I have heard people mention this other program that uses the term “triad” (a term, btw, that has evolved into the 4 skills I now talk about in the blog) but have never taken the time I need to take to check this out. Really appreciate both your feedback and the link. I will do that follow-up. VERY glad to hear the material here has been useful to you! 🙂
Erik
August 19, 2012 at 5:37 pm
Sarah
I came across this blog and could really relate. I have suffered from anxiety for 18 years. It started in grade school when I was a hypochondriac. Then when I was 12 there were a couple people around my age at school who were killed in a car accident…needless to say that’s when I experienced my first panic attack. I woke my mom up screaming telling her I was having a heart attack and dying. A very scary thing for a 12 year old to experiene. During high school I made dozens of trips to the er. Nothing came of the trips of course. When I was 21 me and my 23 year old brother were hospitalized for pulmonary embolisms. Talk about anxiety! After 6 months of blood thinner and several tests and more trips to the er, they later found out it was all a mistake. We never had them. Still every pain, we were convinced it was a blood clot which led to more er trips. I went to a lung specialist, had heart tests, and even had a hearth cath. Because of the constant chest pain and trouble breathing. Again, everything fine. Still had my panic attacks but they were every now and again. After I got pregnant with my first child, all my fear and anxiety went away…except for the occasional attack. That is up until a year ago when my uncle was diagnosed with cancer…8 months later he died and my world flipped upside down. I have had anxiety constantly all day and it is unbearable..I guess I would call it health anxiety??? I have a constant fear of dying even though the odds go against this..I am a young healthy active person with no history of any health issues, or family history for that matter. It’s just awful..right now my heartburn is sooo bad of course I think it’s a heart attack but I have had this a few months ago and had multiple tests and a tube down my throat and there was inflammation. I am sooo stressed out. I also had head pressure a few months ago and it had to be a brain tumor…had an MRI…nothing. I CAN’T LIVE LIKE THIS!, I do feel alone and crazy. It’s never been like this. Heart palpitations. Chest pain. Headaches, trembling, hot flashes, extrem fear of panic and death…PLEASE HELP!!! I have a 4 year old tha I cant give my all to because of this…I am also a stay at home mom with a husband that works ridiculous hours that doesn’t help!! Ahhh I want to move on with my life!! Thanks soo much!
August 30, 2012 at 7:14 am
Erik Kieser
Sarah:
First off, I’m sorry you had to deal with all this crap. Nobody should have to wade through any of this, let alone all of it. I’m sorry you are this harassed by anxiety.
Second, you don’t have to stay here. I’m going to drop you a note directly to your email, but the short answer is this: your anxiety starts (and will end) in your thinking. Let me quickly say here that this DOESN’T mean that you’re “making things up”, weak or somehow crazy for being anxious. ALL this means is that the origins of your anxiety stem directly from things that you are thinking – largely unconsciously, or at least semi-unconsciously – and that whatever is in your thinking can come under your control, with practice, patience and steady work.
Your fear isn’t ONLY coming from your thinking – it is amplified by your worries about the various Flight or Fight responses you have as a result of your scary thinking. That’s a second and necessary piece of this work – learning to “discount” those responses. This is essential, and will also help you in your current situation hugely.
Look for my email. In the meantime, don’t give up! You can beat this!
Erik
August 30, 2012 at 8:12 am
Natalie
Dear Sarah, I’m a stay at home mom to 5 kids (ages 9months-10) and also with one in college, and I know exactly what you’re going through. Erik is entirely correct–we have to fight this in our mind. I’ve been following Erik, and he’s been such a blessing. He has gone through all this and he knows what he’s talking about.
Every time I get a “heart flip” (sometimes a bunch in a row), now, when I start thinking it’s a heart attack–I try to change my mind and think that it’s a “fight-or-flight” sensation…getting me ready to run if there’s a lion attack. (I also had gotten an EKG done with all clear results…and my sister and father went through the whole “heart testing” because of them and came out with clear results, so I guess it can be hereditary???)
We almost lost my elderly neighbor (who treats me like a daughter and my kids like his grandkids) this year, and that is when my panic attacks and everything started coming back full strength. It is in our minds—not that we’re crazy—just that we are extremely intelligent and sensitive people. In other words, we think too much! and if it’s about negative things, then we make ourselves “sick with fear”
Erik is right…you have to work on it to get better…and you CAN get better. One way I have been working on it is by building up my faith in God. I read something from the Bible every morning (before I even get up out of bed–or I don’t have time), and I’m working on a few books by Joyce Meyer including “Power Thoughts” which has been helping me keep my mind on the right track.
Also, just like Erik says—you have to take care of yourself physically and emotionally. Physically, I tend to get more “flips” if I don’t sleep well/enough and if I’m over-exerting, during sickness, and also the week before our lovely-women’s-thingee. Emotionally–I’ve had to say no to things that used to be fun to me in the past, but aren’t anymore (some tv shows and movies and I DON’T read the news anymore—which REALLY helps!). Also, I don’t drink coffee or alcohol anymore—for the reason that I do not want those heart palpitations—-caffeine, sugar, and alcohol seem to bring them on more.
August 30, 2012 at 8:22 am
Erik Kieser
Thank you Ms. Natalie for these comments! Couple of things I want to highlight here:
1) ANY stimulant (caffeine, sugar) and ANY depressant (alcohol) will impact our bodies, and we notice it a lot more when we’re being hyper-aware/afraid of our body responses (as we are when we’re fighting anxiety. Good counsel to leave them alone until you’ve got a good grip on the tools that shut down anxiety at the source – our thinking.
2) Loved the comment on self-care. Easily one of the things we’re WORST at when we’re dealing with anxiety. Thank you for the emphasis on this Ms. Natalie –
3) LOVED the comment about us being “intelligent and sensitive”. It lies at the heart of the battle we’re engaged in, having both good minds and sensitive ones. Diminish either and we probably don’t fight this as much, or even at all.
4) Any tools that help bump us out of the track that anxiety carves in our thinking – that anxious, obsessive, worry-it-to-death thinking – are good tools. Scripture reading is a great one. Affirmations are another. Do what works –
Again, thank you for this – really appreciate your response here.
Erik
August 24, 2012 at 4:00 pm
steve
Wow, great read very encouraging! Erik, i hope you don’t mind me sharing my experiences on this discussion board. I believe the root of my anxiety and depression stems from orientation issues that were repressed from age 14 all the way to current time (20 years old). I was always seen as a confident and successful young man, who without a doubt would reach success. I am halfway through a concurrent education program to become a teacher, however I have ZERO self confidence and developed serious social anxiety over the past 2 years. While wrestling with the orientation issues, I maintained a girlfriend for almost 2 years which i recently had to end out of respect for her. Aside from that, for 2 years I’ve been totally anxious. Loud noises will make me jump, I always feel people are looking at me or judging me when I speak, and have had trouble maintaining real relationships. Worst of all, all of this has physically manifested into my voice. I feel incapable of talking properly. I am always too quiet, people constantly ask me ‘what?’. It’s like I forget how to talk properly! just monotone all the time. To cope I just build off their conversation by asking questions, never really putting my 2 cents in. It has gotten to the point that I feel I have nothing to say at all, even around my friends. I feel like the whole orientation suppression has left me like a shell, empty of emotion or excitement. To top this all off, the constant failure at social interaction has spiraled me downwards into a very, very deep depression. I’ve begun seeing a therapist and a speech therapist but it all seems so bleak still. I have school starting in about 2 weeks with the option to defer the year which I am seriously considering in this state.
How can I get past this? I miss my old self and I am worried that my future is at risk here if I cannot figure this out asap 😦
August 30, 2012 at 6:51 am
Erik Kieser
Steve:
I just responded to your most recent note here at the blog and in email. I refer you to those answers. I’m sorry that you’re in this crappy place. But be clear on this: you don’t have to stay here. When you describe the state of “like a shell, empty of emotion or excitement” you’re describing classic depression resulting from chronic anxiety. The comment about “always feel like people are looking at me or judging me when I speak” says VOLUMES about the fears/anxiety you’ve managed to develop around these social situations. Nothing you did deliberately or consciously, obviously! Anxiety – you are not the prisoner of this. You have some work ahead of you – and you’re completely the equal of it.
I hope to hear back from you here in the blog or by email! Let’s get this sorted out!
Erik
September 2, 2012 at 5:26 pm
Kendra
Erik,
Thanks for helping others. I know how it feels to feel like no one understands, to feel like a pill will help, to feel like this will be something you will have to deal with for the rest of your life. I would like to share my story. I am 25 years old. I have always had stress, I just used to know how to deal with it. Until you have had a panic attack, and carried the anxiety that it brings, it can change your whole train of thought. I passed out two months ago while on vacation. A week later I had a full blown panic attack. I tried Xanax for a few weeks but it never seemed to do anything, actually it seemed like it was making it worst. I had thoughts I never had before. I thought I was going crazy. I thought I was going to die. Things seemed hopeless. I DID everything in my power to just make it go away. I saw 3 therapist, who label me with different things, and have seen 2 doctors who prescribe me medications. This isn’t the answer to changing anything. There is nothing wrong with m.e, there is nothing wrong with people who have anxiety. It is all about change of thought and overcoming these thoughts. I have had constant chest pain from my anxiety. Sometimes my thoughts take over, even though I have seen a cardiovascular doctor and he tells me I have no heart problems. My heart muscles are healthy and fine. My mind believes there is something wrong which slips me back into a way of thinking that can cause panic. I have been doing great lately. Focusing on all that life brings and knowing that there is hope for me. I know that my anxiety has been taking to the extreme, but it is how I deal with it is the real outcome. Even though I am doing better, I still have some days that are harder then others. I want to be able to deal with this without turning to medications. I know I can. It’s hard but I know that it is possible. I’m wondering if there is anything else I can do to help when I get these thoughts, all the WHAT IFs take over. Like I said some days are harder then others, but I know it won’t be like this forever. I thank you so much for reading, I am looking forward to hearing for you and I hope that someone is able to read my story and know there is hope. Thanks Erik.
September 6, 2012 at 7:50 am
Erik Kieser
Hey Kendra!
Can’t say thank you enough for this post to the blog. You are in this writing describing the battle of literally millions of people. You’re exactly right – the fight is in our thinking, not in our bodies. Our bodies make is harder, scare us, distract us, make us crazy – but the fight is in our thinking.
It is very powerful to read your notes about visiting doctors and trying medications. Xanax is a tool that can provide some people with some relief, for some period of time. It won’t stop anxiety. And it is hard to read that you’ve been labeled and diagnosed by doctors and therapists and you STILL didn’t get the help you needed!
The key to this work is identifying where you are “what if” thinking, what issues you are scaring yourself with, and then doing the patient work of unpacking that scary thinking from crisis (which it isn’t) back into problem (at worst.) It sounds like you’re doing that work, but if you want to do some email exchanging I’m happy to help you with that sorting process. And of course don’t forget to dispute and practice “discounting” those Flight or Fight responses in your body that amplify your anxiety!
Again, thank you for this note – this is a fight you can win, with patience and determination.
October 12, 2012 at 9:19 am
Jeff
What if the things we’re afraid of are irrational, such as becoming disabled or dying? I don’t have situations where I feel panicked; my stress/anxiety seems to manifest in my body. Everything looks dark, my neck and upper back hurt, my skin burns, my muscles spasm (all of them: hundreds), my stomach hurts, my eyes hurt and water, my fingers shake and I have body twitches, I’m very jumpy, and I am chronically fatigued. I’m not even sure what to walk through. I thought I was having heart attacks, but then more physical manifestations began and dying from a heart attack became a welcome thought, so that fear went away. Now my fear is MS, ALS, Muscular Dystrophy, and anything else that would leave me disabled. I was deathly afraid of doctors, but I’ve been seeing them for the past two months and have been getting all sorts of tests resulting in nothing, but I guess I overcame the fear of doctors. I’m seeing a therapist and am taking Bupropion, but I’m getting off the meds. Been married for three years, have two little step kids, and a newborn as of three weeks ago. This is interfering with every aspect of my life. We have been more or less homeless for the past four months and staying with friends, but we are buying a home now so that will hopefully help the fam. I can barely function at work and by the grace of God have been able to hold on. I look back at life and realize I always had fear and stress; sometimes more masked than others. It seems that my entire approach to life is flawed, so not sure how to walk through it; not even sure what to face. Can’t redo my childhood.
October 17, 2012 at 6:39 am
Erik Kieser
Jeff:
Thanks for this note, and I’m sorry for the challenges/frustrations that anxiety is dumping in your life. I will copy this note to you directly by email as well. Some things to start your thinking:
1) You’re dead-on when you say your stress is manifesting in your body – you’re describing classic Flight or Fight responses. Same thing with the jumpiness and the always-feeling-tired thing.
2) You say you’re not even sure what to “walk through” in terms of unpacking your anxiety. Yet just a little later in the email you list out some pretty impressive potential sources of anxiety!
a) 3 small kids (and all the work and energy around caring for them)
b) Not having your own space/staying with friends AS a family
c) Worries about getting through work given how much you’re fighting anxiety responses
and, I’m guessing from what you said, at some points worries about finances as well.
ANY of these could be huge generators of anxiety.
And yes, I’m certain you’re right – you’ve been battling anxiety for a very long time now – you couldn’t be in the place you’re describing at the moment and NOT have a significant history of anxious thinking.
So your mission, should you choose to accept it (little Mission Impossible reference there) looks like this:
1) Start a journal or written discussion with yourself about where you are converting problems (big or small) into crises in your thinking. You’ve already started with this email. Spend some time just listing out where your thoughts naturally go as you’re writing. Don’t decide that anything is too small, or shouldn’t be a concern of yours, or is silly – just write. This writing is only for your eyes, and is meant to be a way to start to bring to conscious awareness the various thoughts that are rocking your world in all the wrong ways. The goal of this writing is to give you some concrete places to start “unpacking” (sorting out) your anxious thinking. Where are you, Jeff, taking issues/challenges/frustrations (or reacting to old personal histories) by making them into crises (i.e., if you don’t solve this problem THIS INSTANT it will injury or death?)
2) And, of course, your Flight or Fight responses are great clues in this direction. Remember that a great deal of our thinking (and especially in the grip of chronic anxiety) is outside of our immediate awareness. You can be having multiple anxious thoughts and not be necessarily conscious that you’re having them. And every one of them is firing up (at the moment) your Flight or Fight responses, physically and emotionally. So every time you have any of the symptoms you’ve described in this note you’re getting a signal that you’re scaring yourself in your thinking. As tedious as those reactions are they are excellent indicators, and can help you identify (with practice) what you’re thinking that is making you anxious.
3) Let me encourage you, if you haven’t already, to read through the blog from November of last year (2011). I think you’ll find the posts that start at the beginning of the month and moving forward useful to you as you do this work.
4) One of the things to call out of that reading is you starting to practice “discounting” the significance of your Flight or Fight responses. I get from my own experience just how frightening those physical and emotional reactions to fearful thinking can be – show-stopping, terrifying, mysterious and scary.
The good (and difficult at the beginning to believe) news about those responses is that they only have one meaning: you’re scaring yourself in your thinking. As ugly-feeling and exhausting as those reactions can be (stomach pain, neck and back pain, burning skin, eyes watering, etc.) they don’t carry any dark significance (as your visits to the doctor are already telling you.)
You can start on this at the same time as your creating your “what if?”/what is scaring me in my thinking writing work. This is why I discuss in the blog how we both scare ourselves with our thinking, and then we additionally scare ourselves with our Flight or Fight responses. You can start “unplugging” that second set of fears right away. It will take time and patience and effort – any of us that fight or have fought anxiety develop a pretty reflexive and deep anxious responses to our physical and emotional Flight or Fight responses.
Please, feel free to start an email exchange with me – I’m more than happy to have a dialogue with you as you sort out your anxious thinking and challenge your physical and emotional reactions. You don’t have to fight this alone! I’m glad you’re seeing a therapist – is that person helping you do this? And I’m curious – have the meds helped, and if they have helped, what is driving you to get off them?
Looking forward to hearing from you. You can and will win this fight with anxiety.
Erik
October 13, 2012 at 2:27 am
Elaine
Hi Eric.
I’m sure you probably aren’t used to hearing from teenagers in regards to panic and anxiety, but here I am. I have always been on the whole a happy kind of person, and haven’t considered myself one who struggles with anxiety…. but all that changed. Last year around this time I just started not feeling quite right. Just tired all the time, and lonely, and I lost a lot of weight because I had no appetite. I suspect depression as the culprit. Anyways, this continued for several months. I remember my 16th birthday back in march this year, how frustrated I was with myself for just not really feeling interested or enjoying myself as I should have. On April 4th I had my first panic attack while at school. I was terrified. I thought I was dying. Several days passed and nothing else had happened, so I just considered it a freak occurrence and didn’t feel the need to address it. However, only five days after that initial attack I had another. And then another. And another. Its been ongoing for months. I had to stay home from school for an entire month just from fear alone. I barely get any sleep because the attacks are recurring throughout the night, and I have several during the day every day. I just want to be a teenager, you know? I want to enjoy my life, to perform well in school, to get into a good college and not be like this. Most of my friends have abandoned me, my family does their best to understand but its hard on everyone. I’m just waiting to get in with a psychiatrist right now. Xanax doesn’t do much for me. If you have any sort of suggestion or advice, I will gladly accept. I just want to be okay. I miss the old me. I hope you can help, I feel so alone.
October 17, 2012 at 7:18 am
Erik Kieser
Thanks for this note, and I’m sorry that anxiety is taking away your energy and your capacity for joy at the moment.
1) If you haven’t already let me encourage you to start reading through the blog from the start of November of last year (2011.) I think you’ll find the posts from there forward useful as you take on this work with anxiety.
2) In the meantime here are some things to consider:
a) Anxiety never comes out of the blue. You (and all the rest of us that are fighting or have fought anxiety) have been, probably without much conscious awareness, dealing with anxiety for a while – probably years. When you reach a place where you’re having panic attacks then you’re seeing the “overflow” in your life of ongoing anxiety. Panic attacks are back-against-the-wall moments, times when your brain and body have HAD ENOUGH of anxiety. They are release mechanisms to dump some of that stress in your thinking and body.
b) Depression is another result of ongoing anxiety. Depression is a response to feeling trapped – mentally, physically, emotionally. Again, you may not be CONSCIOUS of feeling trapped – but trapped you feel. And you can’t feel trapped without first feeling anxious about being trapped – anxiety comes in front of depression.
c) You don’t have to be conscious of any of this before it starts! Many of us – even most of us – didn’t see these patterns until they were on top of us. One of the great lessons of the last century as far as human thinking is concerned is that we have a LOT of thoughts, and many of them are happening outside our conscious awareness. We can become aware of them, but it takes a little work and practice.
SO – your mission now is to sort out in your thinking where you’re converting problems (concerns, worries, issues, challenges in your life) into crises (oh my God, this is terrible, I’ll never survive this, this will mess up my life or even kill me!) in your thinking. Again, read the blog posts I’ve recommended. In addition try these 2 steps:
1) Start a journal or Word document where you spend some time considering what beliefs, fears, thoughts are making you anxious. Look for clues around anything that you find yourself asking, in some form to yourself, “what if?” Where are you in the future in your thinking, expecting bad or terrible things to happen? Where do you feel trapped in your life? Where do you feel you might be failing, or could fail? All good places to start.
2) Starting practicing the thinking/understanding that the panic attacks, and ANY of the Flight or Fight responses you experience in your body or feelings, don’t mean anything. I KNOW from my own panic attack histories how scary/frustrating those attacks can be. Here’s the wacky part: they are JUST reactions to significant stress. They don’t signal the end of the world, they don’t mean you’re going crazy, and they don’t mean you’re doomed to fight them for the rest of your life. They are JUST physical and emotional reactions, however serious they feel.
Both of these efforts take some practice and work and patience. I KNOW you want this out of your life NOW – at least I know I did. 🙂 But the work, and the outcomes, are infinitely worth doing.
Feel free, please, to start an email exchange with me directly if you’d like. If you need clarification, if you need examples, if you just feel like venting, know I’m happy to trade emails with you. You don’t have to feel alone in this work. And I’m very glad you’re seeing a therapist soon – therapy can be a great, effective way of doing this work of “unpacking” your anxious thinking.
Thank you again for your note! You can beat this anxiety and get your life back!
Erik
October 15, 2012 at 11:15 pm
Aal
Hello Erik,
First of all I would say you are wonserfull, helping people to come out of their anxiety traumas! Great!
Im 19 and i have got 6th level anxiety and depression issues (sometimes), im a very senstive girl, feel bad about litte things that acually in really wouldnt make much differences.
I have got some sort of social phobia. My hands tremble when am with group of people, or socializing, soetimes a lil trembling in my legs too, that makes me more nervous and leadsto self -esteem, decreases confidence. 😥 (i lack confidence and self esteem)
Any sort of tension or dad shouting at me makes me tremble a lot,makes me feel worst.
There are times when feel very happy, and no wonder all of a sudden I feel very sad, lonely, insecure, I feel like nobody loves me or cares about me, no body understands me.
Another kind of feeling tha troubles me is, such things come to my mind like, why did i say this, i have should said that instead, why did I behave that way etc.
Could you please help me, reading the previoius comments and replies, I find hope, and feel like am the only one with such weird issues. 😀 😀
October 17, 2012 at 7:45 am
Erik Kieser
Thank you Aal! And thanks for this note –
Several things come to mind as I read your note:
1) People who wrestle with anxiety are in general “sensitive” in nature. Sensitive gets a bad rap these days – people see it as weak. Just the reverse. Sensitive is a source of strength – that capacity to be tuned in to other people, to be aware of how they feel, to be aware of our own feelings. It is also, however, one of the reasons we who fight anxiety fight it. We tend to take on too much of the world’s challenges and problems, and as you said, most of it is stuff that we can’t do much about/make any difference about.
We can be sensitive and still not be overwhelmed by the world. One tool to help in this is to do exactly what you said here – do some conscious thinking about what you will focus your sensitivity on, what matters to you and what you can do something about, and practice letting go of the stuff that is beyond your control.
2) I suspect you don’t just fight a social anxiety – I suspect you’re dealing with anxiety in general. Your Dad shouting at you and your response also suggest that you are fighting some fears of failure in various relationships – i.e., you’re afraid you’ll let someone down, or get in trouble.
3) Please read through the blog posts starting in early November of last year (2011.) I think you’ll find those posts very useful as you start this work.
4) You are not alone. You do have people that care about you. You worry the way you do about what you said, how you behaved, because (like I said above) you’re very worried that you’ll blow it somehow, make someone upset, and YOU’LL be to blame – at least in your thinking.
5) Your goal is to sort out, or what I call unpack, the thinking that you’re doing that is making you anxious in the first place. Again, read the blog posts I’ve recommended, do the exercises I’ve suggested there, and see what comes up in your thinking.
If you want to start an email exchange I’m more than happy to do that! I’ll copy this to your email as well. Thank you for this note! You can and will beat this anxiety stuff –
Erik
October 25, 2012 at 4:23 pm
Sarah
I’m glad you’ve been able to work through your anxiety in this way! However, I feel like mine functions very differently from yours. I get physical symptoms of anxiety (heart racing, dry mouth, sweaty palms, tense muscles) just from trying to ask a question in class or at a seminar and during interviews or presentations. Even if I plan for these situations very thoroughly (coming up with questions beforehand, etc.) I still have physical symptoms. I am able to push through and force myself to ask the question, but the symptoms will still be there two weeks later when I want to ask something again. 😦
October 28, 2012 at 9:31 am
Erik Kieser
Sarah:
Thanks for your note here. First, I’m sorry you fight this specific kind of social anxiety – there isn’t much joy in this.
Secondly – permit me to disagree with you. 🙂 You are, in my humble opinion, facing exactly the same kind of anxiety as anyone else who is dealing with anxiety. It is my contention that it is literally impossible to be anxious unless we have one or more anxious thoughts about potential outcomes to a situation in our thinking in the first place.
These thoughts do NOT have to be conscious – i.e., we don’t have to be aware that we’re thinking them the moment we’re thinking them. I was very skeptical about this back at the beginning of my own battle with anxiety, but I’m very clear these days that we have thoughts that don’t necessarily run through our conscious awareness.
SO – I would argue that you have one or more worries/fears about what MIGHT happen (consciously or not) when you speak in front of a class – even if only to answer a question or in dealing with an interview. Planning, in this regard, doesn’t do the work of what I call “unpacking” the anxious thinking in the first place. I can do a lot of careful planning and prep work, but if I’m afraid then I’m still going to activate Flight or Fight when I’m in the situation that makes me anxious, and so I’m still going to have the Flight or Fight responses you described here in your note (i.e., heart racing, dry mouth, etc.)
The key is to get that unconscious or semi-unconscious thinking surfaced to consciousness, and sort out what you’re afraid of in the way of outcomes when you are in a public speaking/response situation. Ironically this was the one of the first places I myself began to deal with my anxiety, and have since (as a speech communication and presentation teacher/trainer) helped a number of people unpack and dismiss their anxiety in these settings.
Some common fears are fear of making a mistake (i.e., tripping over your words, missing something important in the answer or presentation in question, etc.), fear of “sounding stupid” (stuttering, mus-pronouncing a word, etc.), and NOT knowing something and feeling embarrassed in front of other people. And these are just the most common sources of anxious thinking for people in these contexts.
Again, these fears don’t necessarily have to be top of mind to affect us/make us anxious.
I’m going to send this note to your email as well. Thank you again for writing here! Please let me know if you have questions or want to discuss this further. You don’t have to stay anxious when you’re speaking in front of other people!
Erik
November 13, 2012 at 7:00 pm
samantha
Erik-
I have the same problem as Sara except my anxiety is not the embarrassment or possible humiliation. Mine comes from the initial thought of having a panic attack. Once that thought is in my mind, it is impossible to get out because the physical symptoms kick in. How would I be able to overcome this with your advice considering I have three upcoming speeches/presentations in November/December.
Thanks!
Samantha
November 14, 2012 at 10:03 am
Erik Kieser
Samantha:
Thanks for your note here at the blog. As a 20-year panic attack sufferer I REALLY get why this worries you.
It comes down to (as you may already get from reading this blog)anticipating what could happen that scares us – the “what if?” question that scare the pants off us. You begin to worry about what could happen if you have a panic attack – then your Flight or Fight response kicks in and starts getting you ready to run or fight, and THAT scares you, and now you’re REALLY worrying about having a panic attack – thinking decays, you just want to get the hell out of there…
The work is two pieces:
1) Defusing the crisis in your thinking back to a problem. That’s initially hard work with panic attacks, mostly because they can be so scary (at least when you don’t really get why they are happening, and because it FEELS like it will just keep happening), but it is completely do-able – lots of us have done it. Panic attacks are extreme reactions to being afraid. They don’t come out of the blue, they don’t just happen, they are responses to anxious thinking. Period.
2) Learning to “discount” the Flight or Fight physical and emotional responses that scare you. Again, initially difficult because you’ve learned to be afraid of these responses. In my case it was numbness in my fingers and hands, dizziness/vertigo, and often nausea. Any of these reactions could freak me out – the combination was enough (before I came to realize that none of these could actually hurt me, and that they themselves were only responses to anxious thinking) to stop me in my tracks.
You face a pretty tight deadline with those presentations to get this done! 🙂 Here are some short-term recommendations to help you mitigate your anxiety and get through those presentations, so you can in turn address the larger issue of why you’ve having panic attacks in the first place afterwards:
1) It is very difficult to stay anxious physically and also breathe deeply. Deep, slow, deliberate breathing forces the body to relax to some degree. LOTS of speakers do this before presentations, even folks that don’t fight panic attacks. It doesn’t keep you calm forever, but it can definitely help you start out calmer. 3-4-5 minutes of this can be very useful.
In this same direction it is perfectly legal to stop and take a slow patient breath while you are speaking. Again, speakers do it all the time – take a drink of water, look at their notes, look at the audience, pause for effect, etc. (BTW I teach presentation skills and do coaching in this direction, so I do have a pretty good knowledge base and experience base to back this up!) We often think that we have to fill every second of a presentation with us talking – but we don’t.
2) Be as prepared as you can be – both with presentation notes and with rehearsal practice. Lots of people avoid one or both because just thinking about the presentation makes them anxious, but this is one of the best ways to help reduce anxiety. It reduces worry about forgetting, it helps you get back on track when you do lose your place because you’re anxious, etc. Prep is key.
3) Work to discount in your thinking what the audience is thinking of you. You may not be concerned with this (from what you wrote here), but it still helps to focus on the task at hand, the presentation, and move your thinking deliberately away from concern or worry about audience reaction. Get up there, deliver your presentation, do your job and be done. Audiences are MUCH less evaluative than most speakers are willing to believe, and in fact most audiences are much more sympathetic with speakers who have clearly prepared and are giving it their best shot. Again, this may not worry you – but it can help reduce anxiety.
4) Deliberate stretching and relaxing of muscles also helps calm a person down before a presentation. Helps after too. Fingers to toes, stretch yourself and work to release tension in your body. Works even better in combination with your deep breathing.
5) Practice moving away from your anxious thinking before you speak, even when it feels almost impossible. Text a friend, hum a song to yourself, chat up another speaker or colleague near you, doodle on a notebook, do whatever distracts you until you speak.
Again, these are all short-term solutions to help you get through that presentation. 🙂
I’m sending this to your email as well to make sure you see this. Thank you again for your note. If you’d like to start an email dialogue about what might be causing those panic attacks in the first place I’m more than happy to do that with you!
Erik
November 15, 2012 at 5:49 pm
Bre
Hi Erik.
You are God sent!
I’ve done a lot if research and your descriptions are spot on especially in regards to my anxiety.
I’ve been anxious for two months. I’m going to cbt and I have a pschiatrist who told me “take the medicine or be miserable.” What a moment for me, medicine to stop misery! I passed.
My anxiety started with extreme insomnia, which lead to me thinking I was dying, which lead to depersonalization, which lead to visual disturbances, parethesis, dizzines, flu like symptoms, sweaty fingers, hot/cold sensations, intrussive crazy thoughts, ultimately I thought I was going crazy and committed myself! I’ve never experienced anything that can over power so quickly!
Today I’m at work, medication free, exercising 5 days a week and taking my vitamin supplements…It wasn’t until after being prescribed anti depressants that a nuerologist had me tested for every vitamin deficiency because his gut told him that I did not need them. What we found is that I’m severely low on Vit D and low in B1 and B6. A prescription for Vit D was given and I’m taking over the counter Super Bcomplex.
I wanted to share my story bcuz I knew nothing about anxiety, but through research and reading (Claire Weekes Hope and Help for the Nerves, Paul Baer Imp if the Mind). I became my own advocate of exposure therapies and floating!
To date I have some lingering symptoms but nothing as severe as the aforementioned. I was wondering, in your experience does it almost seem as if the body resists that final step if recovery by bombarding you with a different symptom everyday. I never experienced leg weakness until today I just kept going and it subsided, then I literally started to stutter and I’m thinking my mind wants me to be afraid so I read outloud and it to passed. I would love your insight into my experience. Thanking you in advance.
November 18, 2012 at 5:50 pm
Erik Kieser
Bre:
Thanks for your note, and for your kind words. I’m VERY sorry to hear the story of the doctor and the take-meds-or-be-miserable attitude – crap. And I’m glad you identified your nutritional issues with the V. D and B1/B6.
Couple of questions before I share my thoughts here:
1) You only became anxious 2 months ago? Before that you were anxiety-free? I ask because the symptoms you’re describing sound very like panic attacks, and while THEY can seem to start out of the blue they invariably have a cause – usually anxious thinking that’s been going on for years or decades, and which, finally, we reach our limit with and things go to hell. Which leads to my second question:
2) So are you working under the premise that the anxiety was CAUSED by the nutritional problems? For all of my experience I have never known this as a causal factor – which is not to say I’m the expert on everything, so please don’t hear this as my saying it can’t be. 🙂 I am saying that if the neurologist and you have identified the deficiencies as the root cause of your anxiety then brilliant, and I’m glad to know this as a potential (although I’m assuming rare) cause of anxiety.
3) What you’re calling exposure therapies are another way of describing facing into your fearful experiences – and that is a VERY useful tool in the fight to overcome anxiety. I’m assuming you were doing exposure to get comfortable with situations that had started to make you anxious after the onset of the anxiety?
OK, so here’s my attempt at an answer to what you’re asking:
1) That lingering symptoms thing/final step of recovery you describe is very much your Comfort Zone/Flight or Fight Reflex still trying to keep you “safe” from anxiety in some form. Your evidence of this being the case is your reading out loud and then your stuttering passed. Of course when I discuss the Comfort Zone I’m really just putting a name to your learned experience coupled with what your brain anticipates might happen in any given situation, and if your brain has decided (often without telling you – works that way for everyone!) then it will activate Flight or Fight in an effort to “deal with the crisis” – even if there is no crisis! So it has no shame – it will will ANYTHING it can to make you step back.
Which requires us to do two things, as you know from the blog:
a) Identify what thinking is firing up Flight or Fight in the first place – what is making us anxious in our thinking – what I call “unpacking” our anxious thinking, identifying our specific fears (often not conscious at the start of this work), and then recognizing where we are converting a situation/challenge/problem into a crisis –
b) Then “unplugging” our learned worries about the Flight or Fight responses we experience (and that freak us out.) This “discounting” of Flight or Fight is essential to learning to not have anxiety keep trying to trip us up when we experience even normal, everyday anxiety. I suspect you’re in some stage of that work right now…
2) It raises the question – have you identified any anxious thoughts/fears that have surfaced in the same timeframe as the onset or just prior to the onset of your anxiety symptoms? Stressful job? Stressful relationship? Family challenges? Family issues? All of the above and/or more? It seems (a guess from a distance, mind you) like a good question to explore, if your brain is still trying to get you back away from this or that thing/situation/etc.
3) Also consider that you are still at the “tail end” of your severe anxiety experience, and it could easily just be a matter of a couple of months of steady, patient challenging your Flight or Fight responses – to get you free of these tedious reactions.
I will send this to your email as well. I hope this is useful to you, and again, thank you VERY much for your note here at the blog.
Erik
November 27, 2012 at 5:24 pm
Ricky
Wonderful stuff. Thanks for sharing your knowledge. I have been suffering from anxiety since I was little, First the anxiety of being left alone in school because an experience I had in Kindergarten when my older cousin overslept an afternoon and did not pick me up ontime.
My greatest anxiety comes from 3 different times when I choked with a piece of ice (2 times and with canndy (1 time). Since then I fear of choking when eating. I have gone to treatment, now taking meds, but it got to the point that I don’t want to live with meds all of my life. By following your advise I believe I’m on the right track, please let me know what else I can do to keep working with my fear and anxiety.
December 1, 2012 at 10:00 am
Erik Kieser
Thank you for the kind comments here at the blog Ricky. Appreciate you making the time.
I will respond in more detail to your email directly, but here are a couple of things to consider:
1) It is my experience (both personally and with the people I’ve known who have fought with anxiety) is that most of us start down this road pretty early. There are often trigger events that we remember (or at least that’s the first time we’re conscious of dealing with anxiety) but usually the context for anxiety is larger/deeper than just that event.
2) I say that to say that often the overt/obvious thing that seems to be the scariest thing for us is also just that – the most obvious, but not the only issue we’re facing.
3) The bottom line is your FEAR of choking, rather than how much actual danger choking presents to us. The heart of this work is sorting or “unpacking” the thinking that scares us – the thinking behind the choking, if you will. It is that thinking – specifically, our fears about what MIGHT happen – that generate anxiety in us.
4) If you’re addressing that work – looking at the various specific anxious thoughts/fears you’ve managed to accumulate in your thinking to date – and working to sort out that thinking from the “crises” they seem to be to the problems or issues they actually are, well then, you’re definitely on the right track. 🙂 Doesn’t happen instantly, takes time and patience and some steady work – but you can definitely get this fear of choking (and a lot of other anxious concerns/fears) out of your life.
Again, I’ll write a note to you directly to your email. Thanks again!
Erik
November 30, 2012 at 12:21 am
John Hosie
Erik,
Please help as i am really struggling..I have endured some real trauma and had some real things happen to me and this is why my anxiety is back bigger and better than ever.
I originally for my anxiety was put on anti depressants and still on them and have no idea if they work..I also was put on valium which to be honest helped a lot.
But i am off them as they are not the answer and damn easy to get addicted to as it took me a while to get off them.
I have a few fears and mind just keeps talking and talking and racing,, negative, negative stuff..
I have a heart phobia and health phobia and it is from real events,,eg had a small heart operation which is called an ablation and since then was very scared of my heart, heart attack,.It use to race for no reason wolf parkinsons disease..
I also have a chronic illness and this also torments me as i worry about all sorts of stuff.
My legs are not working right from a motor accident hence a lot of pain in legs,
Lately again i am getting more anxious as i have taken my self away from society, where i feel safe.
No enjoyments,, movies, hobbies i dont even watch tv as it makes me anxious..I know this has lead me to depression and to be honest i have bought some anxiety cures on internet with no success as it was to much reading and didnt have an approach i could understand..It is making my life miserable,,I have had only a few panic attacks but a lot of extreme anxiety where head feels foggy, body aches, pulpitations,feeling down and miserable and lots of other physical and mental things.
I check my pulse all the time and as i write this i am tight chested tummy rumbling and feeling really sick and yuck.
It is really getting to me and i dont know what to do..
I try to reassure myself that everything is alright and i am in no harm.
I am sorry for this being so long, but my doctor just wants to try another anti depressant and the one thing that actually helped he knows he cant give me, nor do i want it.
I am making my partners life a living hell as nothing is pleasurable to me as it means leaving where i am and that is again not fun..
I get very extreme phyical sensations that want to take me to hospital all the time..
I am beside myself..If you have the time is there any suggestions and could you send it to my email as i dont even like being on the computer to long..
thank you and you are doing a great job
thank you
John
December 3, 2012 at 10:11 am
Erik Kieser
John:
Just wrote an email in response to this to you. Please let me know when you get it. And be clear: you don’t have to stay where you are with this much anxiety. I’m sorry you’re having to fight this fight, but know it isn’t forever.
Erik
November 30, 2012 at 4:41 pm
John Hosie
Sorry last point with my anxiety..It even scares me that my pulse does not go threw the roof, in fact it stays quite normal, but i get the tight chest, short of breath,shaking, all sorts of stuff and of course this is too a worry, worrying about anxiety..I dont get what is going on.
December 3, 2012 at 10:21 am
Erik Kieser
John:
Just a quick follow-up to your note here – everything you’ve described – tight chest, shortness of breath, shaking – all of that is simply Flight or Fight gearing up your body for trouble – in this case, trying to respond to your (conscious or unconscious) anxious thinking. I KNOW that this gets freaky/scary – it seems to be coming from no-where – but in fact it has a clear cause, even if in that moment you’re not conscious of it – one or more anxious thoughts have zipped through your brain, anxious enough to rattle your cage/make you fearful.
Erik
December 2, 2012 at 6:38 am
Ricky
Thanks for your indight. Will be waiting for your e-mail.
December 18, 2012 at 2:14 am
Jeremiah Ahern
Hello Erik,
I had depression 3 years ago- took Zoloft for about a year and was on. I thought i was fully clear. I am assessing a job option the last few weeks and am very undecided- I have accepted the job but my gut says not to take it. I am very undecided and it is causing me a debilliating anxiety spiral. I went to doc last week and she prescribed Paxil and Xanax. Taking it two days now and really stressed out….. I am amazed how quickly this thing has grabbed me from nowhere. Feeling worthless and really worried I wont pull out of this, Expecting my second child in January is adding to the pressure. i dont wan tto be a burden on my wife…..
December 22, 2012 at 10:03 am
Erik Kieser
Jeremiah:
I will respond directly to your email about this as well, but here are my first-cut responses to your note:
1) Depression is simply anxiety with the conviction that things will never get any better. Anxiety says run, get away from whatever is scaring us/making us anxious. Depression is the result of long months or years of anxiety (often when we’re not even really conscious of BEING anxious) and the growing conviction that things will never get better, that we are trapped and we have no-where to go.
2) So – it is my belief that you’ve been fighting anxiety to varying degrees well before you ever found yourself depressed. That anxiety has surfaced in this new job situation, but it was there the whole time.
3) Medication is brilliant for diminishing the worst of anxiety’s and depression’s symptoms. What it can’t do is end the anxiety. The anxiety is in your thinking, and you have to address it there, directly.
4) You DON’T have to continue being anxious! You do need to get in and sort out/unpack the thinking that is making you anxious, but that’s work that you can do. Please read through the blog from November of 2011 to the present day for immediate recommendations on techniques and work you can do to get this moving.
Erik
December 23, 2012 at 4:00 am
Jeremiah
Thanks Eric,
I am not sure how you find the time for reading all this stuff- thank you.
I declined the job and have gotten some relief, I.e. I am sleeping a little better. I also stopped the meds. However, I am still very anxious, now about filling empty days waiting for our baby and concerns for the future. I have started reading the blog and it is very good but very big.
Having read some of the blog I feel I may have declined the job for the wrong reasons, I.e. making crises out of problems. But at the same time I was no able to take it- the spiral went too deep, and I know there are other options out there for me.
I am trying to stay positive and deal with issues as they come into my head but that alone is taking a lot of my energy and makes it difficult to charter a way out.
Any direction on finding the first steps is appreciated…..
December 28, 2012 at 9:56 am
Erik Kieser
I have responded to your email directly, and just wanted to make sure you knew that (spam filters get in the way sometimes.) Let me know when you get my reply! 🙂
Erik
January 4, 2013 at 11:35 pm
jimmy arreola
Hi Erik I am 16 years old and I’m suffering from anxiety and panic attacks the most time I get panic attacks or anxiety attacks is when I plan to go out I start to feel nervous dryness of mouth and get nausea then I start to freak out I sometimes even get it randomly at my house n I have to go outside to get some fresh air to try and calm down I had this problem about 2 years ago and had regular counceling I actually got over it for the whole summer I would live my life like there’s was no tomorrow hangout with friends ect …but recently I’ve been getting them again I’m in the model of my brother which he recently got married I would always be with him since we were little kids and have fun but he moved now to his wife’s parents I’ve been a little sad lateley had to go outside and cry my emotions out I’m very emotional right now but I have the the feeling of I can do this I can beat this this is nothing nothings wrong with me but I’m just scared of the outcome but I think I narrowed down to what I’m afraid of I thinks its the nausea and vomiting ,vomiting is the worst thing in life for me and when having a panic attack I get real nasues any tech ices you know that can maybe calm me down and reduce anxiety and stress?really appreciate it thanks!
January 6, 2013 at 8:48 pm
Erik Kieser
Jimmy:
Thanks for your note here. Let me get clear about one thing with panic attacks: they are caused by a LOT of anxious thinking, and it doesn’t have to be conscious on your part. Panic attacks are a kind of “overflow” response to anxiety. A person is anxious for a while, it builds up, and then BAM, you’re in the middle of a panic attack. It isn’t just about calming down. It is about identifying what specific anxious thinking is making you have panic attacks (and the Flight or Fight Symptoms you listed here, like dry mouth, nausea, vomiting, etc.)
I’m going to send you a longer answer by email to give you some specific recommendations for what to do to get started, but be clear: your panic attacks are just the most obvious sign of your anxiety. You have some anxious thinking to identify and sort out. As you do that work you’ll kick these panic attacks in the butt once and for all.
Erik
December 31, 2012 at 10:14 pm
Cara
My husband and i started a HUGE home renovation that has been taking us over a year to do. We saved our money for years in anticipation for this project but was hard to part with all the money we worked so hard to save up. Now my husband is having anxiety issues. My husband works his normal job 50+ hours a week. He has worked on the house along side contractors but now the rest of the work is all for him to do and is making him feel overwhelmed. I don’t know how to help him cope with the anxiety, i hate to see him feel this way. He has felt like this since july. Can you please help we would like to tackle this on our own NO MEDICATION!! thanks so much
January 3, 2013 at 8:16 am
Erik Kieser
Cara: Thanks for your note here at the blog. I’m going to respond directly to your email address as well, but here are some beginning thoughts to start this process for you:
1) If you’ve read the blog at all (and I encourage you to in particular read from November of 2011 through right now) then you get that anxiety comes from a simple source: anticipating bad things coming in the future, and as a result firing up Flight or Fight in our bodies and emotions to deal with the “danger” our thinking is conjuring.
Our brains and bodies can’t tell the difference between real, physical, in-this-moment danger that can hurt or kill us and frightening future scenarios – it is all the same to us physically. The moment we’re afraid, whatever the cause (real danger or anticipated future crises) we activate Flight or Fight, and now we’re anxious.
2) The key then becomes identifying where we have turned a challenge, problem, issue into a crisis – enough of a crisis to activate Flight or Fight and make us anxious. This distinction is crucial. A crisis is really a crisis – it is here and now, and if we don’t deal with it then we are at a real risk for getting hurt or even killed. Getting caught in an earthquake or dealing with a tornado is a genuine crisis. Being attacked by a pack of wild dogs is a crisis.
But a problem is just that – something we have to tackle across time, develop some strategy to manage, probably do a little thinking and even research to make sure we get the scope and options open to us, and it takes probably some experimenting and tweaking to get resolved. (At least the big problems.) It can’t kill us today, or tomorrow, or next week, or usually even next month. Lots of problems we face we treat as exactly that – problems. But when we convert a problem to a crisis is when we start to generate chronic/debilitating anxiety.
3) SO – what are the problems that your husband is converting (unintentionally, of course!) into crises in his thinking? You mentioned burning through some saved money that was targeted for the home renovation. What makes that budgeted money hard to spend – i.e., what in his thinking would start to see that spent money as crisis-creating? One way to examine this is to ask what are the “what if?” questions that he is asking himself.
Those might look like this: What if we need that money for a big medical bill later? What if I lose my job? What if we spend all this money and we don’t like the outcome? What if it was all a waste of money? Etc. And I’m sure I haven’t exhausted all the possibilities for what ifs in his thinking! 🙂
The mission is this: to identify that “what if?” thinking (which always go to the negative outcomes, the dark scenarios where everything is messed up, goes to hell, etc.) and work to convert that crisis back into a problem, or even a series of problems/challenges/issues, that need some attention, thinking and planning.
4) And we can’t forget that Flight or Fight makes that hard – our bodies and feelings ramp up to deal with danger, we FEEL anxious, worried, even scared, and we think we need to DO SOMETHING NOW – except that there is no danger that can hurt or kill us right now, and we instead need to gear DOWN, return to problem thinking, get out of crisis thinking.
This is a small set of skills that takes practice and a little time to acquire. It is also very do-able. As I said I will forward this response to you email. Feel free to start an email exchange with me (and that goes for your husband if he’s interested) – I don’t charge for email. 🙂 At least not yet! Thanks for your note –
Erik
January 7, 2013 at 10:34 pm
Jenn
I came across this site tonight and I’m going to read more when I get time tomorrow but I hope I can find something helpful. I’m 33 years old and suffered from panic disorder with agoraphobia since I was 16 (clinically diagnosed when I was 25). I’ve taken all the meds and all they do is cause me more anxiety so I have to take anti-anxiety drugs to combat the anxiety side effects of the SSRI’s. That’s seems very silly to me to have to take a drug to combat the side effect of another drug that is just magnifying the problem I already have. But, everytime I go to a psychiatrist they ask me to try another drug. My anxiety manifests itself in different ways sometimes and there have been times where I have been relatively anxiety free but those times are short-lived (less than a year). At this point I haven’t driven more than a couple of blocks for almost 3 years. It saddens me when I realize how long it has been. I depend on my husband and my mom to shuttle me around wherever needed so no at work suspects a problem. I also have extreme difficulty staying alone for any length of time. I also can’t go into large stores by myself. I can manage a convenience store but a grocery store or something like Walmart is impossible by myself and sometimes very difficult with my mom or husband. I also cannot eat in public currently for fear of choking. As somone who has lived with a variety of major anxiety symptoms over the years, I’m amazed at how strong the mind is in trapping us in these situations. Thankfully I learned years ago that I had anxiety and that I wasn’t just losing my mind. Unfortunately, I’ve been unable to get rid of it for any length of time. Any insight anyone can share is greatly appreciated. I’ve become an expert at hiding my anxiety symptoms but it’s exhausting. This needs to go away!!!
January 9, 2013 at 9:49 pm
Erik Kieser
Jenn: Thanks for your note here at the blog, and I’m sorry this has plagued you for as long as it has. There’s no joy in it. I fought this for 20 years myself.
Have you had a chance to read through the blog yet? If not I recommend that you start with the post dated 11/20/11 and work through to 8/8/12. That will give you the basic framework and the tools I’ve articulated so far in this work.
I will also send this note to you directly at your email address.
I know one thing: you don’t have to stay stuck in anxiety. I’m sorry for the long journey through multiple medications that you’ve had to endure. Meds can be helpful for some people, doubly so when you’re actually in possession of good tools to break anxious thinking once and for all, but they don’t work for LOTS of people, and they can only ever be a stop-gap, a way to relieve some of the worst symptoms, until a person can engage that work and shake free of anxious thinking.
Sending the email to you directly now – looking forward to hearing from you!
Erik
January 8, 2013 at 10:06 pm
Martha
Hi Erik
I have had the same symptoms as most of the above – ie chronic anxiety/fear of ‘unknown’ so to speak. I would really apprecite you sending me some tips/coaching to curb this feeling, which is most unsettling. I would like to have more control of my emotions and not make everything a drama or something bigger than it is – I understand it all starts with the thinking process, how do I alleviate this problem. I understand some inner work and discipline is in order – I would very much appreciate some skills/tips/tools to get rid of this feeling once and for all! Thank you Erik – I appreciate your time.
January 11, 2013 at 9:23 am
Erik Kieser
Martha:
I am happy to oblige, and will respond directly to your email. In the meantime let me recommend that you read in the blog posts from 11/20/11 through 8/31/12. That will give you the basic outline and the tools as articulated to date. And thank you for your note here!
Erik
January 13, 2013 at 1:21 pm
Peter
You’re a good human being Erik. A generous soul.
January 13, 2013 at 11:19 pm
Erik Kieser
This is very kind of YOU Peter – thanks for this note. 🙂
Erik
January 13, 2013 at 1:40 pm
Dawn
I really enjoy reading this and hearing that I am not alone or going crazy. I have been having panic/anixety attacks for about ayear and a half. I started them after I got divorced and was left in a state away from all my friend and family. I am just not sure if anything will help me short of quitting my job, packing up and moving back to my home state. But this website has giving me some good information.
I just dislike the sweats and the rapid heart beat.I also get the feeling of being dizzy and lightheaded. I feel like I am having a heart attack and I went to my doctor my heart is fine, but the fear is so real. I am not sure what to do. But reading this gives me hope.
January 14, 2013 at 9:57 pm
Erik Kieser
Dawn!
Thank you for your note here at the blog. You are definitely NOT alone… and you’re not going crazy either. It is terrible, awful really how many of us that have fought or are fighting anxiety have worried about losing our minds! Ugh.
You are also (since you’ve checked with your doctor) NOT having a heart attack. You are experiencing classic Flight or Fight, which includes that racing, rapid heartbeat that SEEMS to come out of nowhere. (I have known people and read about folks who have been to the doc dozens of times, convinced there HAD to be a physical problem… and all the time it was anxiety.)
In case you haven’t make sure to read the blog posts from 11/20/11 through 8/8/12. Those set up the basic framework and discuss a number of tools to use. One thing to start doing immediately is create a journal (hand-written or on your computer) that you can start doing that “unpacking” work I discuss in the blog. What are the “what if?” questions that you’re (unintentionally, of course) scaring yourself with in your thinking? Where are you creating crises from problems, generating indefinite negative futures from present challenges?
And of course feel free to write me directly if you’d like – no charge for email exchanges at the moment and I’m happy to help you get started.
You don’t have to stay afraid!
Erik
January 14, 2013 at 8:30 pm
Drew
Erik,
I’m having basically the same problems as Jimmy. I’ve become very nervous and nauseous before dates in particular. It’s very hard for me to eat on them because of this. Any tips you can provide about how to overcome this fear will really help me. Thank you for running this page, you’re helping a lot of people who need it.
January 16, 2013 at 7:07 am
Erik Kieser
Hey Drew!
Classic anxiety responses here in this before-dates stuff. You’re asking yourself one or more “what if?” questions in your thinking, consciously or otherwise, and that thinking is firing up Flight or Fight. Your mission is two-fold:
1) Identify those “what if?” questions that are sparking your fears and challenging them/unpacking them.. You’re spinning out one or more scenarios in your thinking (again, consciously or otherwise) that are making you anxious. Some samples might be “what if I blow this? What if they don’t like me? What if I say something stupid? What if I never find someone to love and be with? What if I’m just a loser when it comes to love? What if I’m not good-looking enough?” This isn’t all the possibilities, as I’m sure you get. 🙂
Look at the blog posts here from 11/20/11 through 8/8/12 – those lay out the basic framework of this model and the techniques to tackle your fears.
2) You have to challenge and “discount” the Flight or Fight responses that travel along with your fearful thinking – nausea, heartbeat racing, sweaty are some of the physical responses we have, as well as the emotional responses. We too quickly attach meaning to those signals – I feel bad, therefore something bad is about to happen to me, or I just shouldn’t do this thing at ALL.
Which is all not true. Flight or Fight (as you’ll read in the blog) didn’t evolve for anxiety – it evolved for real danger. So you have to train yourself to see those responses as just indicators that you’re doing anxious thinking.
I’ll send this to your email as well. You don’t have to let dating scare you! And you are not the first person to be scared by dating, believe me! 🙂
Erik
January 31, 2013 at 9:23 am
Nicole
Thank you Erik for all of your hard work! Since I developed hypothyroidism after the birth of my son I have been getting anxiety as well. I worry about being the best mom and I also have to drive all over for work and I have gotten so fearful of highways, bridges, and tunnels. I want so badly to get to my old self. I also loved to go out but fear of traveling has me canceling plans with friends and so on. I do have hope and want to be the old me so badly to live free.
February 1, 2013 at 8:36 am
Erik Kieser
Nicole:
Thank you for this note and for your kind words! You can have your freedom and your old self back – and you can, as importantly, do some model improvements on the old you – i.e., learn to manage anxiety much more effectively! 🙂 You’ve got some anxiety going on, that seems pretty clear from this note. Read the blog posts from 11/20/11 through 8/8/12 for a complete outline of the model I’ve developed and the techniques I suggest to get the work moving. Also feel free to email directly if you’d like some help getting started!
Erik
February 1, 2013 at 4:14 pm
Filipe
Hi Erik,
I would like to explain you my situation.
I had depression between 14 and 16 years old. It was at the time associated with many different factors, parents, girlfriend etc. I played football and my club closed. After 2 weeks i was diagnosed with depression.
At the time i didnt complaint too much about this issue, but the depression was associated, with other main factors. After some years, around my 20´s i started to ruminate about my past event, and tried to somehow find reasons and insights to my depression. I end up always more anxious, desperate, and with frustration. Developed a kind of automatic thoughs, that i expected somehow to relieve me. I found out after went to a Psychologist (CBT) that my behaviour was leading me to nowhere. So i learned new ways of thinking to vanish my anxiety. Anyway was never solved completely and i often reffused my thoughts saying internal words like “STOP thinking”. Of course it was feeding my anxiety. The main thoughts was about football, the club where i played and remember how tuff was quitting what i liked. The rumination ended 2 years ago when i learned these “Stop Thinking” in my mind and ignored the thoughts. However i always felt a tremendous effort to ignore the thoughts, and raised my anxious in daily life, because i always was expecting for something bad thought, i was trying control my thoughts 100% and this besides unnatural is not healthy. So i found out 3 months ago, Mindfulness techniques that helped me a lot at accept my thoughts and my feelings. However besides i dont have rumination nowadays, i´ve fear about the same event – football. I´m alert everyday, and this kind of awake lead me somehow i believe to more anxiety. I wake up every morning monitoring myself, “how i feel”, “if my football thinking of fear is there yet”? I try star the day as Mindfulness says, be awake, present moment, i concentrate in sounds, and breathe , but i think too much. Im always in the state of “expecting the worst” and i cannot relax because of that. As i learned to face my fears, i´m looking footbal much as possible, first because i like , and this fear doesn´t make me sense, and then because i want to overcame my anxiety, because somehow i think i am like i am because i avoided too much . And i found out when i´m seeing football i dont feel more uncomfortable, that not seeing it , rather, i feel more uncomfortable in rest of the day, expecting how i will react seeing the game, like questions , i will feel ok seeing the game? and trying to find out solutions that only give me more anxiety and take me to nowhere etc, and its hard to me ignore these questions , even i do effort to stay only with the feeling and not enter in thinking negative patterns. Then when i see a game i find a kind of a relieve like (i´m not feeling bad, i don´t have reason to worry etc), but in a day life i´m still afraid of this particular theme, that lead me to a big anxiety and a negative cycle. Please help me Rick, because i´m tired of search for solutions. Am i doing right face my triggers? I think i am, but sometimes its to hard face my predictions and thoughts about i will lead with this.
My apologies for my English, i´m not native from English countries.
Please help me ! 🙂
Thank you,
Filipe
February 4, 2013 at 11:32 pm
Erik Kieser
Filipe:
Thank you for your note here at the blog. I’ve written you directly to start an email dialogue with you. You sound like you have some solid tools for disputing your anxiety, and that all that remains is for you to “unpack” that anxious thinking – i.e., sort out the precise “what if?” questions that are dogging your thinking and making you anxious, and reframing them as problems to solve or issues to address, not crises that can hurt you. I don’t know precisely what you’re “what if?” questions are from this note, but I’m guessing that the loss of your football club set you up to worry about your future, your expectations, what life has in store for you, etc.
I look forward to having a longer conversation with you about this!
Erik
February 4, 2013 at 5:46 pm
Tasiablu
hi, I an a 35 yr old Caribbean Native, and i experienced my first anxiety attack about 3 yrs ago, it tapered of and only became more pronounced in 2012 and this yr. i have been worry about heart issues and i experience pain, breathlessness etc. I am the caregiver fro my sister who has MS and I also take care of her kids. My living arrangement causes me to be away from my husband and I have been infertile for 11 yrs., add to that financial issues and i don’t know what to do any longer!
February 7, 2013 at 7:55 am
Erik Kieser
Tasiablu:
Thank you for your note here at the blog. What you’re describing sounds very much like classic anxiety, and I’m happy to help any way I can to get you on track to getting the anxious thinking clarified and unpacked. I’ll drop you a note directly to your email, but in the meantime a couple of things to do:
1) Read this blog from 11/20/11 through 8/8/12. That gives you the basic framework and most of the tools I’ve articulated in the blog.
2) Work as you do that reading to identify as clearly as you can for yourself where you are asking yourself “what if?” questions – the kinds of questions that tend to make us anxious.
You’re living a pretty intense, consuming lifestyle at the moment (i.e., it is mostly about other people, not about you) and you are not necessarily in a great personal support situation (i.e., being away from your husband.) You’ve got potentially powerful sources of anxious thinking identified just in this email. And it sounds like you have one big “what if?” jumping out of this email when you mention the problem with infertility. What does that issue mean for your future for YOU specifically in your thinking? I can make some guesses, but what really matters is what you think/the meaning you have applied to this issue-turned-to-a-crisis.
Please feel free to email me directly at erik.kieser@yahoo.com. You don’t have to stay afraid, don’t have to continue fighting anxiety.
Erik
February 8, 2013 at 10:26 am
alwaysireland
Hi Erik –
I think im suffering from anxiety and I dont know what to do.
Thought i found the light at the end of the tunnel with this CalmClinic let me take all your money Triad Technique… Then i found this – people seem to be inspired by you.
February 13, 2013 at 10:31 pm
Erik Kieser
I’m sorry to hear about the CalmClinic not being effective for you. I don’t know anything about that program (and will find out more), but in the meantime I’m more than happy to start a dialogue with you about what you’re wrestling with and see if it looks like anxiety! 🙂 I’m sending you an email directly as well.
Erik
February 11, 2013 at 12:07 pm
alliepat
Erik…this is a “money” post!! I am working on unplugging from my physical anxiety reactions as you describe- discounting the physical feelings and then becoming more curious about identifying the fears and tackling/unpacking them.
I needed more examples and this post is amazing in giving that to me. It describes much of what my counsellor works with me on…making plans. Taking things one thing at a time. Make a list, take some action, take a break and then take some more action. Yes…this give me hope. I’ve been here before, but I can do it again, and again, and again.
Bless you…
Allison
February 16, 2013 at 11:58 am
Erik Kieser
Allie:
Isn’t it remarkable how we don’t really understand the whole go-slow thing? 🙂 Is it modern culture? Is it just the impatience of being sick with being anxious? Does one feed the other? I don’t know. But I do know that some things are skill sets that take time – you can’t just jump into them like you jump into a set of clothes.
Erik
February 23, 2013 at 12:14 am
Kris
Found this blog by chance and wow, I can relate to many comments posted here. I feel I have to write as well. Read a few Erik’s previous posts just now, but I am brand new to this. Trying to be as short as I can.
My husband and I separated 2 and a half years ago, had problems in our relationship and it all broke apart. We had plans to move out of the country for his job, and I had already left work because of him. It also happened few weeks before our scheduled trip overseas to visit my family. I felt awful in front of everyone, the whole summer was horrible. When I returned to the states, I couldn’t go back to work, it would have been too embarrassing to tell them that I ended up not going with my husband. For a year I worked this laid back part time job, took some courses, and started applying for grad schools. Now, I am working on my final project, but the closer I get to completing, the harder it gets. I procrastinate, don’t do any physical exercise (1 yoga, 2 runs and few walks for the whole year), I feel sad, cry sometimes, feel down, anxious… I don’t want to work for anyone after school, working during set hours just sounds like slavery, I’d rather freelance which also scares me… Will I manage or will I be struggling? Will I ever be with anyone again? Do I even believe in it anymore? Sometimes I think I am sick, then I think I am crazy and imagine it. Am I anxious and depressed or am I lazy and just need to push myself more? Sometimes I am just so sad, I can’t. It should be about time to cheer up.
All that said, my friends don’t see me depressed. But I pull myself together, I don’t want to complain and be this Debbie Downer, and they don’t see me crying like a looney and getting out of bed in the afternoon. But I know that I barely work few hours a day and it takes effort to get anything done. It’s not normal.
p.s. As far as I can remember I have always had those moments or even periods of time when I feel incredibly sad. Not sure why, probably for more than one reason. When I was little I disliked kindergarten because there was a woman that just wasn’t suited to deal with kids. My mom had temper, my parents were arguing. I was happiest at my grandma’s in the country. Although I was a good student, I did not like school, just hated getting up in the morning and I was often late. To be fair, high school was actually quite fun. For college I moved to the US. It was interesting, but I also remember being quite anxious my first year. Later had some jobs, often enough I wasn’t actually into what I was doing and I was constantly late. Sometimes I felt like a loser. It got better eventually when I ended up with more creative jobs.
March 3, 2013 at 3:16 pm
Erik Kieser
Kris:
Just got a response to you directly at your email. Thank you for this note.
You are fighting both anxiety and one of long-term results of anxiety, depression.
None of which has to be forever. You have a lot on your plate in the worry department. You don’t have to keep that plate loaded.
Read the blog posts from 11/20/11 through 8/8/12. Happy to have an email discussion with you whenever you’re ready at erik.kieser@yahoo.com.
Erik
March 10, 2013 at 7:07 pm
David
Erik, nice to know there is someone out there that experience anxiety and willing to help others! However, I read post after post and no technique or answer is given only that there are steps to be taken?? I do not wish to pay for advise as I have done this before and it doesnt work….just looking for someone out there who are willing to share what method works and what its about?? What is the Triad Tecnique and what is the steps? Im getting an idea of what the “fight or flight” is but is there more to it than facing ur fears head on hoping it’ll go away? I was just sitting in class today and suddenly anxiety popped up …I felt I wanted to run out or I might have a full on attack on the spot but tried to calm my mind which it did…but for the whole hour had shakes…which felt so terrible . So hard to quiet your thoughts …so whats the answer to dealing with this? Any FREE advise out there?? Looks like everyone who posted had some traumatic experience in the past which causes the start of this anxiety…and I did as well….now just looking for those true samaritans willing to share advise without cashing in! God bless!!!
March 11, 2013 at 8:39 am
Erik Kieser
David:
I sent the following note to your email as well:
First off, I’m sorry you’re wrestling with anxiety. I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy. Secondly, you’re definitely fighting the edges of panic attacks – sounds way too familiar.
Recommendations:
1) Read at my blog from 11/20/11 through 8/8/12. That outlines the basic framework and makes specific recommendations for next steps. You might start with the post at 3/2/12 to get an overview of the 4 skills you need to kick anxiety, but let me really encourage you to read all the posts in this sequence, as the framework is pretty important to making sense of the skills.
2) You’ll see in the post on 3/12/12 that I suggest you start a journal as you begin to “unpack” your anxious thinking. I can’t recommend that strongly enough. Computer, paper, whatever works for you.
3) Feel free to hit me back with all the questions and clarifications you need. I’m finishing a book about this framework and every conversation I have (live or in email) makes that work stronger and clearer. I’m also willing to talk on the phone – the first phone call is free. Calls after that, if you want them, are $50/session. It is my experience that lots of us just need some clear understanding of why we’re fighting anxiety in the first place, some steps to take to climb out of anxiety and some support while we’re making the climb.
4) There have been, it appears, a number of people that have offered “quick fixes” to anxiety and depression, and some of them have made some serious money with those offers. I don’t know that those quick fixes have never helped anyone, but I do know I get a LOT of emails about people having tried multiple programs and getting nothing out of them.
Getting free of anxiety isn’t, for most of us, a quick fix situation. It is about understanding how we respond in our thinking to specific issues as crises, how we, as a result, scare ourselves and fire up our Flight or Fight responses in our bodies and feelings, and learning how to stop that self-scaring process. It takes time, patience and work.
It is also however completely achievable with that steady, patient work, and never takes as long as it took to get anxious in the first place. Not by a long shot. 🙂
I charge for my phone time (after that first free call) because I’m becoming inundated by emails and calls, and I’m still running a business consulting practice as well as writing this blog and doing coaching. I will sometime in 2014 launch a website around the completed book and start an online community as well, since I’m convinced that most of us need way more support that most of us have in this fight, either from our family/peers/neighbors and from the professional medical community.
You don’t have to stay anxious. I’m more than happy to help. Please let me know that you got this email, and feel free to start an email exchange around your work! Looking forward to hearing from you –
Erik